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a small, shithole where everyone's wonderful.
underage drinking capital of the world.
everyone's fake. i'm fake. the girl sitting next to me is fake. your boyfriend is fake. your mom is probably fake too.
population- 500.
we're surrounded by jersey city & union city, but we're too white for them. & we might get shot.
overpopulated by people.
cops come when you sneeze.
wanna-be-guidos reside here.
the whole town is like US WEEKLY.
everybody knows everybody.
"i live in Secaucus, woohoo!"
by Y0 MUTHAAA April 04, 2006
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12 minutes drive to midtown Manhattan, when Lincoln Tunnel flows.
LT jammed? Get a train, it's 9 minutes to Penn.
The station is too out of town? Get a bus, it's 24/7 to NY.

And you can park along the street and leave the car keys in.
Find another place like this.
Should we take a bus from the (Secaucus) plaza to New York tonight?

Naa, it's Tuesday, let's go with my car.
by A--Z May 04, 2010
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a small swamp in northern new jersey completely lacking in stuff to do but full of banks and gas stations. secaucus is made up of mostly fat italian kids. the only thing there is to do here is play beerpong, smoke crappy weed in buchmiller, drive up and down paterson plank road, and if you're lucky score some blow.

perhaps secaucus's most interesting place to go is buchmiller park where you can usually find six or seven 21 year-old unemployed losers in bands hanging around getting drunk with their 17 year-old slutty girl friends.

the cops don't do much either. they pretty much just drive back and fourth between the towns three dunkin doughnuts's.
Jersey City Kid 1: You wanna go chill in Secaucus tonight?

Jersey City Kid 2: No.
by bleghhhhh September 10, 2006
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The burbiest town in Hudson County, New Jersey. Until the 1950's it was most well-known for its pig farms. In the 70's and 80's it became well-known for the outlet shops and warehousing. Now it's mostly known as a place for NYC tourists to find cheap(er) accomodations and big-box shopping, as well as the outlets waaaay across town. No more pig farms, just a handful of residents who act like pigs. Many people in town are long-time residents and are good people with a Jersey "attitude", though in the past few years there are more immigrants seeping in. Despite that 2/3rds of the town's land (most of that being swamp) is owned by Hartz Mountain, Secaucus still has a real small-town feel, just drive down Paterson Plank Road and see. Marra Drugs is delightfuly old school, hope it stays around even though CVS moved in across the street. Natoli's Pizza is some good stuff. One of the country's first Blimpie's outside of Hoboken opened up here next to the old Acme/present CVS. Damn, do I miss that Acme.
I hate it when the news reporters say they are reporting from "suh-CAH-cus." It's SEE-caw-cuss, stupids! If you say it that way to someone from Secaucus you'd get your ass kicked straight into the Hackensack.
by someone18 September 10, 2006
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a town where a bunch of punk ass sluts live. people smoke too much weed. the class of 2010 is whack. joey imprev is on steriods. and every class is a hoe like urtina. the parties are whack and drinking is our job. we dont like any other towns and think we are the shit. the best hang out is no where because all people do is drive around. never come to seacucus.
i hate secaucus
by the real talk hoe April 28, 2009
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A small shithole were the hardest decision is to go to dunkin or buchmiller park.Most of the student population attends Montclair state university because they can’t get into any other college. You have the two hot guys that fucked with every girl in the high school and those who are good looking but end up playing Pokémon go. If you live in Secaucus your gonna attend the football games and be apart of “caucus crew” and on mdw stay in Hershey motel in “sleezside” and if you are a underclassmen you have partys with two kids and think your the shit .
Secaucus is like a cult everyone and there mother know each other
by Ur gay asf May 29, 2019
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