Actually paying attention:
You: I just found out I have herpes...
Me: Holy crapman, I'm so sorry. Are you sure it's not an ingrown hair? Maybe
frostbite...Have you been sticking your dick in snow lately?
You: LLTM, Dane Cook is fucking kickass.
Not paying attention:
You: My wife died today, Tim. I'm contemplating suicide.
Me: LOL
You: I'm serious here, Tim, I thought you would be more understanding.
Me: lol ok
slip of the tongue perhaps,
Those idiots who drive around in a ridiculously raised pick up truck, making a top heavy vehicle even more top heavy and unstable
A:*gah*
B: "Whats the matter"
A: This dam prickup is blinding me.
B: Stupid thing's, as if there lights weren't blinding enough as it is.