The phrase hedgehog'
s dilemma refers to the notion that:
(1) The closer two beings come to one another in a
relationship, the more likely it might be for them to inflict psychological pain on each other
(2) Yet if they remain apart, they each might feel the roughly-equivalent (psychological) pain of loneliness.
This notion comes from the conjecture that hedgehogs, with sharp spines on their backs, might
hurt each other if they get too close. It is a character trait believed to be possessed by some individuals, in real life as well as in works of fiction, sometimes causing
anti-social behaviours, often allegedly caused by an unpleasant past experience of intimate relationships. A person who suffers from the hedgehog'
s dilemma
will usually avoid becoming too close or involved with someone, due to
fear of another similar, possibly painful, experience, such as they had experienced in the past.
Porcupines are a
better example of the hedgehog'
s dilemma due to their commonly known dangerously sharp spines. As you can imagine, getting too close to them
will provoke them and might force a few spines in you in self defense.
