Disasterwank 

A wank that goes terribly wrong and usually results in a big stealthy clean up.

Often caused by Backfire, a lack of tissues, an unexpectedly early ending or a surprise intruder.

The worst type of contaminated spillage.

Mike's friend: How come you were so late to first class?

Mike: Oh man, had a Disasterwank and it needed tending to. Looked like a war zone!

Mike's friend: ah hard lines man, not had a Disasterwank in years!

Disasterwank by carbo-fuckin-nara October 10, 2014

Disaster Wank 

A wank that takes your mind off a disaster that has just occured, allowing you to have a clear mind to think of a solution.

1) I rolled my car last night. Hit two pedestrians and a dog.
2) Bloody hell, what did you do?!
1) I had a quick Disaster Wank then set about destroying the evidence before running off into the woods.

Disaster Wank by Harold Bishop's Love Child March 2, 2010

Disasterbance 

When a person or situation moves beyond being mildly disturbing but it is not a full blown disaster.

Geez, Todd, This is the best part in the movie and you keep talking through the entire thing. You’re creating a real disasterbance. Don’t be an ass!

Disasterbance by Tarklee May 13, 2022