wife who examines husband's genitals carefully and critically, especially for any sign of infidelity.
Dicktective: (wearing magnified glass and getting a noseful of her husband's penis and shaking her head in disbelief.)
Husband: Look .. before you say anything, I haven't washed my cock since we last had anal.
Husband: Look .. before you say anything, I haven't washed my cock since we last had anal.
by Dettol February 14, 2012
Get the Dicktective mug.A person (mostly female) scouring a party looking for the most likely guy to bang with the least resistance possible. These are often slutty small-town females who are only moderately attractive, but are used to being the life of the party because every other chick where they come from is ugly and fat. They often are infested with a wide array of STD's and other ailments, emotionally and otherwise...
Brian: Hey Dave what happened with you and Shawna last night? Did you hit?
Dave: Na bro, she was a dicktective, I wouldn't touch that with a 10 foot pole, i.e. my dick...
Dave: Na bro, she was a dicktective, I wouldn't touch that with a 10 foot pole, i.e. my dick...
by Misterperfect February 19, 2010
Get the dicktective mug.Related Words
The bro who is looking out for his other bros boners to inform them to put that shit away as to not embarrass himself.
Rick: Bro tuck your boner into your waist strap.
Billy: Dude you're being such a dicktective right now.
Rick: Fuck you fatty, I will axe your first born child.
Billy: Dude you're being such a dicktective right now.
Rick: Fuck you fatty, I will axe your first born child.
by Jewishboi1996 August 19, 2014
Get the Dicktective mug.A female who researches both the length and girth of local men's dicks for being a potential prospect or partner for life.
Another busy day suckin and measuring cocks;
being head dicktective ain't easy, but somebody's got to do it!
being head dicktective ain't easy, but somebody's got to do it!
by Wet~N~Wild69 August 12, 2022
Get the Dicktective mug.an incentive in the form of a penis. Something a girl wouldn't do other wise unless a hot guy "dick" was going to be present.
I usually don't go out of my way but the dickentive is crazy ... mad hot guys are gonna be there tonite =
by illo5012 October 11, 2009
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Somebody who can make an early identification of a dickhead before complete posse infiltration has occurred.
Typically used with the preface "You are not much of a..."
Somebody who can make an early identification of a dickhead before complete posse infiltration has occurred.
Typically used with the preface "You are not much of a..."
Steve: Hey Stella, who's this douch you brought to Sunday beers?
Stella: I know right, I thought he would be more of a happy drunk.
Steve: Aw shit man, you ain't much of a dictective.
Stella: I know right, I thought he would be more of a happy drunk.
Steve: Aw shit man, you ain't much of a dictective.
by ladiesman_2I7 November 24, 2009
Get the dictective mug.1) The subtle art of penis inspection.
2) When performing innocent error dictection exercises but you have something else on the brain.
2) When performing innocent error dictection exercises but you have something else on the brain.
by Salpacino2200 April 15, 2009
Get the error dicktection mug.