Skip to main content

Clubbing Seals

Bashing baby harp seals on the head (thereby killing them) for to procure their pelts for garment making.
"Clubbing seals may be brutal, but it pisses off the PETA fuck-ups so I endorse it wholeheartedly"

Clubbing Seals

Another great American Passtime, Generally targeting baby mammals called seals and bludgeoning them over the head with some form of blunt object.
Other passtimes of the sort include kicking puppies, burning the elderly, or listening to eminem (the only one of which I wouldn't reccomend due to the high amount of cruelty to animals).
Eminem meks nasty freaky stangelove to 12 year old groupies while cascading numbers of men and/or women 'impale' his wife on their 'hot man spikes' (See Manloaf).
Clubbing Seals by K~ August 10, 2003

Clubbing Seals

Unorthodox method of batting in cricket, jerky, some would say ugly. Originated in Surrey County Cricket
Stewart's been clubbing seals all afternoon.
Clubbing Seals by Alan Bail June 16, 2003

clubbing baby seals 

synonymous with "shooting fish in a barrel," relating to doing a task, often involving hunting or destroying an enemy, that is painfully easy.

Should not be used due to the inherent image of animal cruelty. Stick to the fish and barrel.
Shooting down enemy planes from an F-22 Raptor is like clubbing baby seals. It's that easy.

clubbing baby seals 

An amusing activity where you head out to the nearest beach, grab some clubs, and beat the shit out of any and all baby seals you see. A good way to release stress if you're fucking crazy.
Guy 1: I walked in on my wife cheating on me today with our Mexican chimney sweeper.

Guy 2: When I have a shitty day I feel better after clubbing baby seals, wanna come with?

Guy 1: Sure, sounds fun.

Clubbing Baby Seals 

The act of an older person having sexual relations with a person under the age of 18, named so because you always want to do it, but they're just too damn cute and you shouldn't
John "So, what did you do last night?"

Stacey "Ahh you know, just went Clubbing Baby Seals"

John "Same!"