crystal brain

noun

1. a keen mind, formidable intellect

2. that which an intelligent person uses to predict future events instead of a "crystal ball"

This term was coined by comedian Adam Carolla on his morning radio show to combat a harpy lawyer who was insisting that she couldn't possibly predict what an obvious outcome would be because she didn't have a crystal ball.

Reasonable Person: That new Sandler movie is gonna blow ass.

Douchebag: You don't know that. You don't have a crystal ball.

Reasonable Person: I don't need a crystal ball; I have a crystal brain.

by ContusorOssis November 5, 2012

mayo brain

A person who is just an absolute idiot.

carson is such a mayo brain. he just bought his vape an hour ago and just lost it at lunch

by sammyc April 24, 2017

brain hairs

a long nose hair that is so long it could only have originated from the cranial cavity.

Brandon pulled a hair from his nose and told me to look at his brain hairs...it was at least 2 inches and he placed it on the dashboard infront of me. true story.

by FatBox August 26, 2006

brain on drugs

A fried egg, sunny side up.

Yo, waiter! Can I get a brain on drugs over here?

by ~*~Rachel~*~ March 7, 2008

Brain Job

The act of getting a brain freeze during a blowjob

hey, baby wanna give me a brain job

by Synyster Stallone November 11, 2010

Brain burn

When a person sees an event or an image that is so horrible they will never be able to forget it.

I walked in on my parents having sex and got instant brain burn!

by Rmc0315 December 28, 2011

bad brain day

A day when nothing anyone says to you makes sense, nothing you say makes sense to anyone else (including yourself), following directions proves problematic and items which should be readily locatable cannot be found (or are found only after much searching on top of one's head).

I knew it was going to be a bad brain day when I finally located my keys in the drawer where I always keep them, my glasses on top of my head, and remembered only after entering the now empty garage that my wife had earlier mentioned that it was her yoga day, which meant she was taking the car.

by maximo hudson June 29, 2009