A fat person who claims they have medical problems preventing them from being a normal weight when they really just stuff their face.
Barbara has always been very overweight and she always claimed she was on a strict health-food diet plan, but one night I saw her at a buffet with a plate overflowing with hotdogs, sandwiches, fries, chocolate cake, and the list goes on. She's a closet hog.
by deepspace10 November 29, 2010
Someone with the compulsive need to tug-it in the closet. Maybe due to a tramatic event of being walked in upon while giving his reliable pair the 1-2 polish and shine, (he wears sandals). There’s no shame, just more mess and not as much wiggle room as your traditional shower has to offer.
“I myself, am a closet tugger, the doors provide a nice secure barrier from the outside world during me time, and my girlfriends fuzzy scarves drape just low enough to tickle the tip.
“Dave is such a closet tugger! Look, he’s wearing crocs!”
“Dave is such a closet tugger! Look, he’s wearing crocs!”
by DrGreenT December 21, 2018
"Dude that man right there is so closeted" "but he's like kinda supposed to be, like a closeted shirt?"
by Flu flu without a clu clue November 01, 2023
Someone who outwardly pretends to be a Chad and a Alpha male hating on women's rights and those that respect wamen. Normally below 5'6, extremely hairy and have names that rhyme with Pevin.
by JueGamlepoo May 07, 2021
When your homosexual baggage has exceeded the maximum "closet" storage capacity and begins to push you into coming out of the closet and you try to push it back into the closet.
Jimmy began prarie doggin' the closet when his mom found the ticket stubs to the Cher / Barbra Streisand concert on ice.
by Alaska Boss Bitch September 30, 2017
Person 1: “Oh my god. A little man just scared me”
Person 2: “was it a Closet Gnome?”
Person 1: “I think so..”
Person 2: “was it a Closet Gnome?”
Person 1: “I think so..”
by NovaRoSe December 22, 2022
It's way harder for LGBT people to be on Zoom without outing themselves! Your mom is like in the room.
by Tino Orbaega February 02, 2023