Mental Masturbation

Manipulating usually flirtatiously yet without doing any actual sexual acts in order to get what you want.

AKA: ‘Hoeing without using your holes’
Just send a pretty girl to go scoop up that check. He won’t tell her no...
#mental masturbation
by FreakyFelonFriday February 06, 2021
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Masturbation Wrinkles

When a guy jerks off more than 2 times a week, and they get wrinkly dicks from it. Especially bad when they are semi-soft.
"Girl , I went to go down on him and he had masturbation wrinkles, I left out of there.
by THEREALHONESTBRUTALBIATCH October 21, 2017
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masturbating on the run

When a tardy individual is getting dressed on their way to where they're going.
Masturbating on the run is to get dressed on your way to the destination

Marge: Hurry up and get dressed we're gonna be late!
Rob: Fuck it, I'll just masturbate on the run let's just go.

I'm not one to masturbate on the run but I can't miss my grandmas funeral.
by Xtra3916 July 04, 2022
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Masturbation Technician

Someone whose job it is to jerk people off for medical reasons
by Bigdickpreston September 21, 2016
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Masturbation fodder

A material that has no other uses except to aid in masturbation.
Look at that picture of a woman's body in a skimpy bikini! I believe I've discovered new masturbation fodder!
by sluttytawny March 19, 2023
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masturbation addict

the guy that decides to announce when he 's gonna watch hentai, and no one cares because he is arab mantas kid AAAAA
this masturbation addict is so weird he just cums every minute
by Kattini April 19, 2022
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Spiritual Masturbation

When an individual subscribing to a particular religion boasts about their good deeds, charitable donations, and seeming-selfless acts in an attempt to be recognised as a more “god-like” person, or “doing god’s work”. Sometimes at the expense of embarrassment and humiliation to the recipient of the giver’s self-serving “generosity”.

Could be Similar and related to “virtue signaling” “white savior complex”
Examples of Occurrence:
“Yah so I was in Costa Rica setting up these churches to provide food to starving children and….
Did I tell you that I bought a house for John? Man he just really needs a hand-up right now and I’m blessed to be the hands and feet of Jesus… His drug addiction has just really flipped his life upside down.”

“We mobilised like 20 people to get her moved

In with a new baby crib and kids stuff that same weekend. Her boyfriend beats on her and she got pregnant really young so has been living hand-to-fist. We invited her to church Sunday!”

Every time I meet with that guy, he just spiritually masturbates the entire time. Never shuts up about all the good deeds he does for down-and-outs. Really personal information too.

It seems like everyone from that church is addicted to spiritual masturbation.
by PerMyLastEmail April 22, 2022
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