Revision Wank

When you're revising surface anatomy and you see boobs which causes you to go on porn and wank.

"I had to revise last night but it just led to a revision wank"

by superdude3435 May 11, 2010

Fat Wank

When one eats a large quantity of food and proceeds to masturbate immediately afterwards.

"Great night last night, got in and ordered £60 worth of Chinese food and had a fat wank"

by RHUL Penrose January 21, 2019

Wank Window

A wank window is limited time frame in which an opportunistic married man is alone in his home and can therefore peruse 'performing art' videos on the home computer whilst digitally stimulating his phallus. Mission control usually grants wank windows when the wife has gone to Tesco with the kids to do the shopping / gone to see relatives / went out with her mates. Wank windows are known to be tenuous and unpredictable because the wife may return early and the act of self flagellation may have to be aborted.

Courier: I tried to deliver the parcel to number 8 this morning but the bloke wouldn't answer the door. I rang the bell repeatedly but he appeared to be glued to his computer in the front room, ignorant twat!
Boss: How'd he look?
Courier: Funnily enough he was sweating, red faced and seemed utterly focused elsewhere.

Boss: Son, a man's wank window is sacred. When you're married you'll understand.

by TheFoolOnTheHillAnarchy October 20, 2012

Status Wank

When someone "likes" their own status on Facebook

John Smith is a status wanker

John Smith likes this

by el foldo December 1, 2011

wank parade

Wanking more than 3 times in night, usually while maintaining nudity.

Last Thursday i was bored while home alone so i decided to have a wank parade to pass time

by stuy.bee November 22, 2010

Wank Throne

An office/gaming chair that's also used for masturbation, particularly if the chair is worn out or in poor condition.

I walked in on Steve sitting on his wank throne, hastily stuffing his boner into his draws with hentai on his Chromebook screen. DESGUSTANG!

by JEFF_BENZOS August 29, 2019

Stank wank

The act of masturbating while taking a dump.

Dude, I tried so hard to get my old lady to give me a blumpkin. She wouldn't go for it so I had to settle for a stank wank.

by Chykaty chyna December 3, 2016