couch dolphin

1. (noun) A colloquial name for the Indo-Appalachian right-finned porpoise, usually found gesticulating betwixt couch cushions very racistly. Swims to the very far right and has a parasitic relationship with the “greatest” and whitest of sharks, when convenient.

2. (noun) A person who has intimate relations with an upholstered sitting apparatus, while they are watching p0rnpoise, because the concept of true human connection perplexes them.
Well… that Jim Dave Vance fellow turned out to be a real, self-described couch dolphin. Yikes. Is this why Cleveland had to get rid of Sea World?
by Judith Jetson Lightyear July 27, 2024
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couch dolphin

1. (noun) A colloquial name for the Indo-Appalachian right-finned porpoise, usually found gesticulating betwixt couch cushions very racistly. Swims to the very far right and has a parasitic relationship with the “greatest” and whitest of sharks, when convenient.

2. (noun) A person who has intimate relations with an upholstered sitting apparatus, while they are watching ‘Flipper’ reruns, ‘Zeus and Roxanne,’ etc. , because the concept of human connection perplexes them.
Well… that Jim Dave fellow turned out to be a real couch dolphin. Yikes. Is this why Cleveland had to get rid of Sea World?
by Judith Jetson Lightyear July 27, 2024
Get the couch dolphin mug.

couch dolphin

1. (noun) A colloquial name for the Indo-Appalachian right-finned porpoise, usually found gesticulating betwixt couch cushions very racistly. Swims to the very far right and has a parasitic relationship with the “greatest” and whitest of sharks, when convenient.

2. (noun) A person who has intimate relations with an upholstered sitting apparatus, while they are watching ‘Flipper’ reruns, ‘Zeus and Roxanne,’ etc. , because the concept of human connection perplexes them.
Well… that Jim Dave fellow turned out to be a real couch dolphin. Yikes. Is this why Cleveland had to get rid of Sea World?
by Judith Jetson Lightyear July 27, 2024
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derp dolphin

I have got to derp dolphin into the world of bruh moments
by depdolphin yt May 29, 2020
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An approximately turkey sized child sized child to be served to one or two dolphin(s), 2-5 times a day.

Specifically in the Atlanta Metro area.
I can see two prime American Standard Dolphin Kid Dreams headed our way now.
by Roycupine November 23, 2023
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Dolphinating

The act a professional swimmer dies while under the water, after the initial dive.
Kathleen Baker was dolphinating when she dove into the water.
by B055REDNECK August 08, 2016
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Dolphin brain

Dolphin brain is a metaphor for the mental connections/ train of thought made by a ND person in between conversation. It can be used to describe the thought process made mentally by a ND person in-between verbal conversation.

Imagine a dolphin jumping out of the water; that's the voiced thoughts/conversation. The dolphin then disappears in the water which is when the unvoiced thoughts happen, and the mental connections between a to z is made.

NT's only see the breach of the water which is just a faction of what is happening beneath the surface which is why confusion happen when a ND goes from talking about mango to orchids.

(Inspired from tweet by @3TrackMind79 on twitter)
Neurodiverse (ND): I love mangoes
Neurotypical (NT): Yeah, me too
ND: I want more orchids

NT: ???

With dolphin brain
ND out loud: I love mangoes

ND in their head: Pineapple is an amazing fruit too
ND in their head: Sponge-Bob lives in a pineapple

ND in their head: He's probably from Hawaii
ND in their head: Uh, there's so many pretty flowers in Hawaii
NT: Yeah, me too
ND out loud: I want more orchids
by Miss_Em February 25, 2021
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