Real Realism For Realists

Drink Up:

I think the warning on alcoholic beverages are too bland. They should be more vivid.

Here are a few I would suggest:

"Alcohol will turn you into the same asshole your father was."

Extended: Real Realism For Realists

"Drinking will significantly improve your chances of murdering a loved one."

"If you drink long enough, at some point you will vomit up the lining of your stomach."

"Use this product and you may wake up in Morocco wearing a cowboy suit and tongue-kissing a transmission salesman."

"Men: When emptying your pockets after a night of using this product, you may come across a human finger, a wad of Turkish money and a snapshot of a naked ex-convict named Dogmeat. The photo will be scribed, 'To Dave, my new old lady.'"

"Women: Drinking this product and enough of it and you will spend the rest of your life raising malnourished children and rusting trailer with a man that sleeps all day. Except for rapes."

by BorisTheBitchhound January 25, 2010

Real Isopod Hours

The time between 1:00 AM and 5:30 AM where people leave their bedrooms in search of food, then stub their toe and wake the entire house up.

*at 2:30 AM*
-ah, I could really go for some doritos, it is REAL ISOPOD HOURS after al-

*stubs toe*
*screams*

by blinkythecomputer January 13, 2022

Get a Real Haircut

A universal insult that can be used in any situation. It will quell arguments and is the supreme insult.

Person 1: Your mum is a fat, smelly hooker!
Person 2: Get a real haircut!!
Person 1: Damn, I'm sorry. *Walks away saddened knowing they have just been burned*
burned

by Godow Nonmi October 31, 2010

100 to 0 real quick

to go from good to bad in such little time

their relationship went from 100 to 0 real quick.

by fosho679 May 21, 2018

For a real one

For a real one means like you’re giving it your all. You’re about to do something and you’re gonna do it good; you’re doing it for your grandma, mama, brother, best friend, your dog. You’re leaving people sister shook. James Charles likes to use this term a lot.

Him: Are you sure you want to do this?

James: Oh yes sweetie we’re gonna do it for a real one

by loverboy1130 December 17, 2018

Real Man

The insult women use when they want to bring down a guy enough to get him to do whatever she wants.

Aside from that fact that there is no definitive image of a "real man" (and no, women's delusions do not count), there's also the fact that nobody ever ask if SHE was a "real woman".

Woman: What? That guy stepped on my toes and you won't defend my honor? What kind of a man are you? I thought I married a REAL man?

Man: Oh yeah? And what kind of a fucking woman are you? You never seem to ever care whenever you ask me to fight some guy TWICE MY FUCKING SIZE over something as shitty as stepping on your toes. I thought I married a REAL woman?

by BusinessMan May 18, 2005

A real man

Someone who holds his oaths and morals. He has dignity, but not arrogant. Faithful till his death to all his beloved. Someone who keeps his promises and treat people kindly. Gentle, patient and kind. Most of all responsible for is actions and words.

A real man is an owner of all noble traits.

by wisdomofyouth August 15, 2019