Squirrel Boner

An idiot. Generally a fratty kind of person who wears only Lacoste, Polo, Vineyard Vines and New Balance. The name comes from the relative size of their penis.

"Look at that squirrel boner over there trying to get in her pants!"
"He'll never make it. She wants a real man, not a squirrel boner."

by Puchley October 27, 2008

Piss Boner

When you have to piss so bad, you pop a wood.

I had to piss so bad that I got a piss boner.

by T-Bone June 30, 2004

Fart Boner

A condition where a person has to fart so bad they become erect; A condition where a person has such a satisfactory fart they become erect.

"Dude, I just shit my pants. I think I have a fart boner."

"Oh man, I'm going to shit my pants. I'm getting a fart boner."

by Jake Adams November 7, 2007

Boner Goggles

The ability to detect a boner in someone's pants when they're above a 3.0 blood alcohol level from at least 15 feet away.

She gently gazed over his crotch with her boner goggles to see if her pray was ready to be capsized.

by shnummy August 1, 2012

Boner sidler

When your significant other / husband gets a boner but he doesn't come right out with it. Instead, he snuggles against you until you feel his boner against you in a surprise fashion.

Me: I was watching Grey's Anatomy last night and my hubby boner sidled me out of nowhere!

Friend: Geez, what a boner sidler. Why doesn't he tell you he's horny and it's time to get some action?
Me: I know!

by Wifeyoftheday February 28, 2013

Suffer boner

Sadistic mixture of pleasure and pain that results from workplace challenges, most commonly experienced by an administrator.

Man, my director’s suffer boner is so big right now because of all these Covid mitigation measures. He has to push it around in a wheelbarrow.

by D.O. Homo February 28, 2022

tinder boner

The mini chub we all get while swiping the sexual depths of Tinder.

I can't swipe at the bar anymore because of my tinder boner

by MomoneyMisa January 9, 2018