Politicians’ Epitaphs

The unspoken words invisibly inscribed on the tombstones of famous or notorious political leaders, whose earthly decisions and actions (or inactions) have positively or negatively impacted millions of people when they were the head of state (or even after they had relinquished power).

A leaked document entitled “Politicians’ Epitaphs” from the secret department of a NATO member state has the following printed:

Here lies Vladimir V. Putin with promises of peace—waiting to be canonized by the Orthodox Church.

Here lies Donald J. Trump with no more lies—hoping to be a future Dalai Lama or Pope.

Here lies Kim Jong-un, on transit to join his dad and grandad—in Hades.

Here lies Robert G. Mugabe on reclaimed white land—still in purgatory.

Here lies Harry Lee Kuan Yew—as long as the whites rule the “fine” city.

by Covido April 23, 2022

epitome

A representative or example of a class or type

“He is seen... as the epitome of the hawkish, right-of-center intellectual” (Paul Kennedy)

by maelstr0m_X1 November 2, 2004

epstein

To have sex with three (Usually female) 16-year-olds at once.

Did you hear kyle pulled an epstein last night? What a pimp!

by DOW September 26, 2006

The Epstein

When you notice that your family has an uncooked salami in the fridge, and you have a hankerin’ for a big piece of meat. You insert said sausage into the vaginal orifice and pleasure yourself. About a week later, when you notice you have an infection, you tell your parents that the sausage they ate for dinner a few nights earlier was in fact the same sausage which you used for your masturbation needs.

Girl 1: Why weren't you at school?

Girl 2: I accidentally gave my family "The Epstein".

by Sammy "Sausage" Swanson March 6, 2009

Alpha Epsilon Pi

Located in many many universities around the country, Alpha Epsilon Pi has existed since 1913, when it was founded at NYU.

This is a nationally Jewish social fraternity, althoughon many campuses, non-Jewish men are members.

At Towson University, the Tau Mu chapter has had the highest GPA for almost 2 years.

Mark Zuckerberg, the man who created Facebook, is a member of AEPi from the Harvard chapter.

Alpha Epsilon Pi brothers are cooler than the other side of the pillow.

by TugboatKirby February 6, 2007

Epsteinesque

To demonstrate ultimate power and control at the top of one's game by “pulling one’s own plug” as a final comment.

One can only wonder how truly Epsteinesque he ultimately is; so far he has compulsively stumbled into very similar territory as his onetime party friend.

by Dr Bunnygirl September 30, 2019

esito

Meaning "Awwww" or "poor you"

We had to walk all the way home last night because our ride ditched us, Esito for us!

by Mandy8488 August 17, 2010