squat cobbler

An act, normally performed on video, intended to titillate the senses. This act is technically a fetish, but (and this is important) it is NOT ILLEGAL! Squat Cobbler involves a fully clothed man, all by himself, who sits in a pie and wiggles around. The more extreme varieties of this lewd act is known as "Cry Baby Squat Cobbler", or "Cry Baby Squat" for short, which involves tears. Usually, the more tears, the more taboo it is considered to be, and to a certain audience, more desirable.

The term originates from the eastern United States where it is commonly called "Hoboken Squat Cobbler" and, like Hellman's Mayonnaise, is called something different west of the Rocky Mountains.

In the midwest it is simply referred to as "pie sitting"

See also full moon moon pie boston crème splat simple simon the ass man dutch apple ass pie sitting Hoboken squat cobbler

Jeff came over and was paid handsomely to perform the Hoboken squat cobbler into a still hot dutch apple pie.

The man does a mean and quite sexy squat cobbler. There are tears, and lots of wriggling! He even wears a batman costume!

by pseudonymnonominon March 13, 2016

squat cobbler

When a man sits in a pie with his bare butt and wiggles

Can you get the video of Steve doing a squat cobbler?

by JCohen175 February 23, 2016

Squat cobbler

Fetish whereas sexual gratification is achieved by sitting on pies and or pastries. Cream pies and meringues are the most commonly used for safety reasons.

Kim:What's your turn on baby?
Sal: I'm a squat cobbler.
Kim: That's hot. Let me get you a French Silk pie.

by Clive Bixby February 23, 2016

squat cobbler

A type of fetish involving a fully clothed adult sits in a pie and wiggles around.

Extreme versions of the squat cobbler exist such as acts involving tears (cry baby squats).

squat cobbler...you know what squat cobbler is...

by shakkkkaaaa February 26, 2016

Squat Cobbler

When a man/woman sits on a pie and wiggles their buttox for the enjoyment of others.

Lacie really enjoys when Matt performs his signature squat cobbler. Her favorite involves a cream pie

by skater271 February 25, 2016

squat cobbler

When a man sits in pie and wiggles around. Sometimes involves crying and/or a costume.

"My last partner had a squat cobbler fetish, I've had my ass in every pie from apple to zucchini."

by slippinjimmy February 24, 2016

squat cobbler

The erotic act of a male squatting to dip his genitalia into a freshly baked pie or cobbler.

Clay: "Damn, my balls are sticky and covered in blueberries this morning."
Billy: "Yeah, you got toasted and ended up being a fucking squat cobbler last night."

by TheMaDsQuatter February 25, 2016