Taking a Swedish

To masturbate while still on the toilet after having taken a shit.

In Swedish horror flicks women are known to straddle a man in order to have sex with him while he is on the toilet taking a dump and so the phrase "taking a Swedish" refers to a masturbatory #2 session.
"I just got through taking a Swedish."

"I took forever in the bathroom because I took a Swedish."

"Were you in the bathroom taking a Swedish because you were gone forever?"
by Lulz§wag December 31, 2020
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Swedish Keyboard

A sex act involving serving someone a home cooked meal while they violently shart themselves.

Made famous by Jiinxy.
Do you want to have some messy fun?

Sure, hit me with a Swedish Keyboard
by ALAAANNNN August 02, 2023
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Swedish Special

The sexual act of filling your significant others asshole with Swedish Meatballs and Marinara while their ass is in the air and then eating the meatballs from their anal cavity.
-Swedish Guy "Hey, you wanna do the Swedish Special tonight?"
by DannnyBoiii January 23, 2018
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Swedish touchdown

Jessica:yo yi george what u at
George:just takin a swedish touchdown
by Alan coolguywick March 27, 2018
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Swedish Periscope

A sex act in which a woman (or man), in a crouching position, places their eye upon the anus of a standing male partner. They then proceed to grasp the shaft of the "periscope". Advanced users can then proceed to adjust the knobs of the periscope. The move is finished with a successful load blown, and a cry from the gazer of "fire the torpedos" as the recipient lets loose a fart. The fart should be moist so the gazer receives a maritime spraying of ocean wind.
Jim: Hey, uh betty. Ever looked through a swedish periscope?
Betty: Nope whats that?
Jim: come back home with me and ill show ya
by Dwarvish Lords of Miltonia August 04, 2008
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Swedish Girls

Swedish girls are some of the hottest girls on the planet! They aren't slags, they are gorgeous and often have sizable breasts, a hot body AND a sexy face. Widely recognised as one of the hottest countries, and with good reason. The girls you pass everyday in the streets are seriously model material.
Tim: I'm totally thinking of going to Sweden for a week, not sure if it's worth the cost though..

John: Are you freaking joking? Swedish Girls are f*cking HOT!
by Al989 February 28, 2010
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Swedish vacation

An unplanned, unexcused extended absence from school, work, or any other daily responsibilities.
Ever since Floyd won 50 bucks on that scratch ticket he's been taking a Swedish vacation.
by mainset July 11, 2008
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