lifetime

Television for women who enjoy eating ice cream (and feeling guilty about it) and complaining about men not putting down the toilet seat. Really, is it that hard to put it down yourself?

Oooh have you seen that Lifetime Original Movie about the woman who gets breast cancer, then gets raped by her boss?

by Jaaacob September 8, 2008

Lifetime Movie Syndrome

Fatal syndrome leading to the sudden death of any individual who has been subjected to ridiculously cheesy films with titles so lame they should be illegal. Also known as LMS.

My mom watched 3 Lifetime movies yesterday and got Lifetime Movie Syndrome. She's no longer with us.

by average josephina April 2, 2013

Lifetime

Is there a reason why this boring channel is even on the air?

I don't know of anybody who even watches Lifetime anywy.

by Matt October 4, 2003

Moment On The Lips Lifetime On The Hips

A phrase used when someone is overeating

Kiersten : Hey Kaylee wanna go on break?
Kaylee : Yeah give me a second I need some chocolate!
Kiersten : Yeah me too!
Kaylee : Mmm I just love peanut butter cups I could eat a whole bag at once! Mmm! Mmm! Mmm!
Kiersten : Damn Kaylee Moment On The Lips Lifetime On The Hips!
Kaylee : Who the fuck cares I love chocolate & peanut butter!
Steve : Wow Kaylee did I ever tell you how much I like fat girls!
Kaylee : Go Fuck Yourself Steve!
Steve : I would rather fuck your thunder thighs!
Kiersten : I told you Kaylee Moment On The Lips Lifetime On The Hips!
Kaylee : OH SHUT THE FUCK UP!!!

by SlopNChop June 2, 2018

Lifetime Movie Network (LMN)

Launched as a sister network to the well-known "Lifetime" cable channel. It started in June of 1998 and nothing much has changed about the network other than the network expanded the movie time slots from 105 minutes to 120 minutes to accomodate more advertising. It professes through its network promos that it shows movies "24/7" although every morning at 2:30 there is a slew of infomercials. The overall theme of the network is simply movies for women and to a marginal extent "female empowerment". A good portion of its movies come from the original Lifetime network, others are made-for-tv movies from other networks, and there are some (but few) select theatrical films. All the movies aired on LMN have at the very best C-grade cinematography, C-grade acting, C-grade script, and just has an overall "generic" feel. The types of movies LMN shows is just drama and only drama but to appear more "sophisticated" the LMN online schedule breaks down Drama into several sub-categories such as "Inspiring, Love/Lust, Justice, Thrilling, Madness, and Vengeance". The whole network is like an analogy of a soap opera. Every movie has pretty much the same concept but different version. The overall plot formula for these movies is: woman or woman's family member gets into a situation throughout the whole movie the woman and/or her family members struggles to overcome the problem. Bottom line, the network just shows a bunch of garbage that is no different than reading cheap romance novels or the National Enquirer.
Here are a few examples of movie titles on Lifetime Movie Network (LMN):

"Mother, May I Sleep with Danger"

"My Son, My Lover" (Is this "female empowerment"?

"Deadly Web"

"Dangerous Child"

"Going for Broke"

If you don't want to drive down to Hollywood video or rent a movie via Netflix then by all means just kill 2 hours by watching a movie on Lifetime Movie Network if you can stand the cardboard characters and storyline.

LMN:

L Low-Budget
M Movie
N Network

Lifetime Movie Network (LMN): a sad excuse for a woman-oriented movie channel.

by Blaine58449 February 19, 2009

Women in Crisis Channel (see lifetime TV)

The cable tv channel marketed to women showing one insipid movie after another about a woman who finds herself in a compromising or dangerous situation that she barely escapes, and could have avoided altogether had she just used her head.

Hey, lets watch some washed up sitcom actresses on the Women in Crisis Channel!

by Noel S December 3, 2003

Lifetime

(adj.) Something that would be said on the Lifetime Channel. Something said to a guy or by a guy in a public manner that should not be said outloud or in front of others.

"I saw comment you left on Stans MySpace page, dude. Telling him you miss your long talks was so Lifetime."

"Steve had a Lifetime moment last night at the bar when Sheila drunkenly announced on stage that she hopes they will spend the rest of their lives in each others arms and walking side by side."

by JessieBeth999 November 13, 2007