asparagus

underwater purple cow with a huge boner that helps it move around

look! the store sells asparagus

by cool A October 18, 2019

Asparagus

The act of being absent

"My conscience is asparagus today"

by Woopdeedoo! October 21, 2012

asparapuss

having your girl eat asparagus hours before you go down on her, resulting in a funky smelling AND tasting vagina

We had asparagus for dinner and afterwards, I went down on her and she had asparapuss.

by darthdano February 24, 2009

Goat Peeling Apparatus©

The well honed instrument of the Goat Peelers. Resembles somewhat in shape a rotisserie barbecue spit with a large, razor-sharp blade attached. The Goat Peeler, applying acute precision and craftsmanship, aligns the blade according to the Goat's size, shape and coarseness of fur; in an equally timely manner counter-clockwise rotates the handle of the spit to which the Goat is attached, running the blade across the surface of the doomed Goat...executing in extreme prejudice, with the goal of removing the skin, fur and gristle from his subject without causing the Goat to expire during the process.

Jebediah: "Jared, have you sharpened your Goat Peeling Apparatus© for the upcoming competition?"

Jared: "Yeah, but I was so drunk off my white Irish ass when I did it that I'd better go over it again. Thanks for reminding me."

by Jeffy the Retarded Beaver August 19, 2007

Asparagus

A zodiac sign that indicates someone who is psychotic and irrational, typically a 15 year old horoscope girl. Used satirically by people who don’t believe in astrology against people who use their starsign as an excuse for being a bitch

Horoscope girl: “hey i’m sorry i cheated on you and fucked your dad but i’m an asparagus, it’s just how i am”

by $Memelord69 January 26, 2022

asparagus head

not a word. just sounds funny

u need a haircut. u look like an asparagus head.

by makiki August 10, 2003

Asparagus Syndrome

An unlucky cunt who is not only painfully autistic (asperger syndrome) but can't spell for shit (dyslexic)

He says he feels a lighter shade of yellow today but when I told him to write down "yellow", he wrote "hjsdf". He must have Asparagus Syndrome

by Aldy September 22, 2005