mobile masturbating

When you masturbate in a moving vehicle, may be done as either driver or passenger

Hanging out with my friends got me so horny I did a little mobile masturbating on the way home to relieve myself.

by Tonksalot September 14, 2018

Big Masturbation

The forces at work trying to make me watch porn and play with my innocent Christian penis. The sex industry equivalent of Big Pharma

Me: Big Masturbation has no impact on me. I don't even do pre-marital handholding
My penis: Get PornHub Premium

by FuzzyDanglers April 23, 2020

status masturbation

When you get off on liking your own post on social media!

My status masturbation is on point!

by Polemuncher May 14, 2016

Air Masturbation

Air masturbation is when a woman sucks air in and out of her vagina or asshole to masturbate with it.

"I heard weird sucking and farting noises coming from her room for the past 10 minutes. She must have been using Air Masturbation.

by baronessjeans May 31, 2018

academic masturbation

The practice in which professors and teachers find new ways to talk about hypothetical and unpractical solutions to nonexistent problems or scenarios. Simultaneous waste of taxpayer money may or may not be present depending on the type of institution.

This new class is a huge waste of time; the professor loves academic masturbation, but hasn't actually taught us anything useful.

by bob seeply December 13, 2016

Rythmic masturbation

When you hear or are listening to a catchy song or piece of music while fapping, and start moving your hand to the beat. You will often be able to hold your load longer which os always a plus.

"Turn of jacob i really want to blow my load before mum walks in, this rythmic masturbation is really annoying."

by Butt plug joey March 21, 2017

holy masturbation

After the occurrence of a massive dry spell, one must partake in the holy masturbation which is the act of sitting in a confessional using holy water as lube as the priest blesses your act of satisfaction

Im sorry father for I have sinned I haven’t gotten laid in 4 years. I must partake in holy masturbation.

by Dman1011 February 21, 2023