The potato theory

the potato theory is the theory stating that: "A potato cannot be created or deystroyed, only transfered from one anus to another" this theory was first put into practice by my physics teacher, in a lesson that involved his wife, a potato, a ping pong paddle, and a un-prepared anus, needless to say it was a fun lesson. Potato theory can also be applied to time and space, for space, this theory enables the users potato to travel to faster than light speeds, inorder for this theory to be put into practice, exactly 2 grammes of mashed potatoes, and exactly 2 grammes of roast potatoes, then these items must be applied to the potato in a very delicate order; mash, roast, roast, mash, mash, mash, roast, mash. then place the potato into your anus and point it in the direction of your choosing. in order to apply this theory to time, is you need exactly 3 grammes of chips, and exactly 3 grammes of roast potatoes, the combined oils from the two potatoic foods, create a time feild, then as in the warp theory, you must place it inside of your anus and you will travel in time

The Potato theory can also be applied to time and space, for space, this theory enables the users potato to travel to faster than light speeds, inorder for this theory to be put into practice, exactly 2 grammes of mashed potatoes, and exactly 2 grammes of roast potatoes, then these items must be applied to the potato in a very delicate order; mash, roast, roast, mash, mash, mash, roast, mash. then place the potato into your anus and point it in the direction of your choosing. in order to apply this theory to time, is you need exactly 3 grammes of chips, and exactly 3 grammes of roast potatoes, the combined oils from the two potatoic foods, create a time feild, then as in the warp theory, you must place it inside of your anus and you will travel in time

by Potato king October 17, 2012

Soulja Boy Theory

The idea that a ridiculous celebrity who appears incredibly stupid might actually be a genius aiming to capitalize on the revenue he or she gains from the mindless demographic their work caters to.

Ke$ha, Lady Gaga, Joaquin Phoenix, Chad Ochocinco, and of course Soulja Boy! All of these and more could fall under the Soulja Boy Theory

by ZPuma December 3, 2010

Critical race theory

An unimportant and harmless idea that has been the focal point of a hysteria the likes of which America has only seen in the McCarthy era, propelled to the new big bad bogeyman by the clinically insane (conservatives).

Critical race theory is nothing more than the critical analysis of law in the united states as it intersects with race.

Naturally, said insane people have created intelligent-sounding, but ultimately meaningless, words such as "neo-racism" and other such equivalent nonsense to justify their insanity.

by Donna tramp June 29, 2021

Unified Theory of 80's Movies

The fact that most all movies in the 80's had, at their core, a single running theme:

Bored suburban middle-to-upper-class white teens have crazy adventures and come full circle having learned a little about themselves.

How this particular zeitgeist arose is a matter of debate; its existence is not.

"Adventures in Babysitting, Mac & Me, Flight of the Navigator, Ferris Bueller's Day Off, License to Drive, Pretty In Pink, Mystic Pizza, The Wizard, Breakfast Club, Lucas, Gremlins, Risky Business, All the Right Moves, Back to the Future, Bill & Ted's Excellent Adventure, The Boy Who Could Fly, Can't Buy Me Love, A Christmas Story, Dirty Dancing, Fast Times at Ridgemont High, Goonies, Karate Kid, Labyrinth, Little Monsters, Lost Boys, The Monster Squad, Neverending Story, Pretty in Pink, Real Genius, Revenge of the Nerds, Say Anything, Sixteen Candles, Some Kind of Wonderful, Stand By Me, Weird Science and War Games are just a few of the movies from the 80's that fit under the Unified Theory of 80's Movies."

by Clintacus August 24, 2006

musical theory

Musical theory is vital knowledge for anyone wishing to compose music involving more than half a dozen instruments. It is recommended knowledge for anyone wishing to arrange music for more than half a dozen instruments. Anyone who writes music for more than about half a dozen instruments without knowledge of musical theory is inevitably either writing an arrangement of a simpler piece or composing modern music.

Serving suggestion: Musical theory best served with at least 2 years experience with actual musical instrument.

John spent two and a half years at the Vienna Conservatorium of Music learning musical theory.

by Bob Hu January 5, 2004

AP Music Theory

Something that continually makes your brain hurt, as not even the teacher knows what to do sometimes, and can lead to brain juice leaking out of ears.

Side Effects : Rocking back and forth in the corner while you hold your knees, because the proper way to resolve a half diminished VII chord is wrong.

Dude. I have brain juice leaking out of my ears after AP Music Theory

by Max Is Incredibly Amazing October 25, 2010

The Mermaid Theory

a theory that a woman, no matter how ugly she may seem at first, will eventually look beautiful to you if you see her every day all day.

Based off the theory that sailors used to spend months at sea and started to slowly see manatees turn into mermaids.

Joe: Dude Kelly is so hot!

Tim: Are you nuts?! It's probably just the Mermaid Theory. you have her in every class.

by Fatchooo January 20, 2011