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cloth encounter

During moments of extreme stress, fecal excretions can no longer be held within the body, and are thus subject to contact with clothing. Such an event is known as a cloth encounter, and these events can be subdivided into three types based on the consistency of the fecal matter and the nature of the contact. Encounters of the first kind involve mostly dry material, and cause limited staining of the fabric. Those of the second kind involve both wet and dry material, and can be expected to leave a mark that will require dedicated laundering. During encounters of the third kind, contact with the fabric is so sustained that fecal material actually passes through clothing and into the outside environment. For safety reasons, garments subject to an encounter of the third kind should be immediately destroyed.
Dean: "What is that horrible smell?"

Jason: "Sorry about that... I've been turtling that spiced meat sandwich for hours, and I think I just had a cloth encounter of the third kind!"
by terminal2 October 14, 2009
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Clothespin Hoe

Hoes that love dick so much, they will show up at your dirty crib, you wearing clothes you haven't washed in 3 weeks and boots you have been wearing all summer long with no socks - but that bitch will pop a clothespin on her nose and hop on for a ride.
"I stopped at Billy's the other day - must have been hot in there because he answered the door sweaty and wearing only a towel."
"What?! Did he have a bitch over there?"
"Yeah but she had to have been a clothespin hoe cause it smelled of hot garbage as soon as he opened the door!"
by reversefront September 9, 2016
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Street Clothes

Anthony Street Clothes Davis is often seen wearing street clothes on the bench
by Franklinuquiqo June 5, 2021
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fibre clothing

fibre (FEE-BRAY) clothing

noun

1. faux clothing specially marketed toward lazy graphic designers and girls with gaping vaginas

2. low quality grunge clothing usually comprised of t-shirts with melted prints and/or iron-on photoshop designs

3. any article of clothing that has successfully been digested and excreted a large llama
"I bought some fibre clothing so I could attend the Halloween costume party as a homeless man."

"Holy shit, her fuzzy taco is laced in fibre clothing. Sick."
by Famous Amos June 2, 2008
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the emporer has no clothes

Used to express when many people believe something that is not true. Used also to express something as untrue. See also the expression "the Emperor's new clothes".

Based on Sufi wisdom, Hans Christian Andersen tells the tale in his "The Emperor's New Clothes", the story this expression derives from. In it. there existed an emperor who loved wearing fine clothes and spent all of his people's money on them. He had a different set for each hour and was, without doubt, the finest dressed man in the land.

One day, two swindlers claiming to be weavers entered the Emporer's city and proclaimed they were capable of making the finest, lightest, most magnificent cloth the world has ever seen. So extraordinary was this cloth, it was invisible to anyone who was incompetent or stupid.

Hearing of the weaver's amazing "talent", the foolish Emporer thought he could use such cloth to weed out undesirables in his city. He paid the swindlers an enormous sum & they set out to "create" the clothes; knowing they would only need go through the motions.

The Emperor sent several advisors to guage their progress and all the advisors reported the cloth magnificent, not wanting to appear unworthy for seeing nothing at all; the cloth didn't exist!

Finally the clothes were "finished", the swindlers already having counted the gold and jewels they had received. A procession was arranged to show off the Emporer's new clothes and the entire city gathered in the center to view them. Having been "dressed" by the swinglers, who remarked how wonderful he looked, and how light the cloth appeared on him, he appeared before his people.

The people, having heard of the weaver's abilities and the cloth's fictious properties, were amazed and offered thunderous applause to the now beaming Emperor. None of them were willing to admit that they hadn't seen a thing; for if anyone did, then he was either stupid or unfit for the job he held. Never before had the emperor's clothes been such a success.

While expressing admiration at their Emporer's new "invisible" clothes, a small boy cried out... "But the Emperor has no clothes!"
"This entire adventure in Iraq has been based on propaganda and manipulation. Eighty-seven billion dollars is too much to pay for the continuation of a war based on falsehoods. The Emperor has no clothes."
- U.S. Senator Robert C. Byrd in a Senate Hearing speech October, 2003.
by casemon July 26, 2005
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drop a clot

slang phrase meaning to freak out over something, overreact or be too excited.
"When i couldnt get my home theatre system set up, I almost dropped a clot" or "Don't drop a clot, it's not that major"
by Slothy McGee July 21, 2008
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Crescent City Cloth

The "Crescent City Cloth" is the official gameday towel for New Orleans Saints fans. It was given that name by the fan club Big Easy Mafia. It is the equivalent to the Steelers "Terrible Towel" only better.
Everyone was twirling the Crescent City Cloth screaming Who Dat after the Saints touchdown.
by NOLAmayor June 6, 2015
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