Brandon

Brandon looks just like Steve Urkel, just a tab bit nerdier. Typically thinks he's a 'gangsta' but is about as scary as a 90 grandma in a wheel chair. He has a good credit score, so you really know he isn't about that life. Brandon usually gets drunk off of 1 drink. Secretly wishes he could come out about his fantasies he has about other men, but his church he regularly attends wouldn't approve. He also has the best assistant at his job (the blonde with big boobs). And yes, assistant at work, he REALLY ISN'T ABOUT THAT LIFE. If you're a girl, don't go searching for Brandon.. He will find you and seek a friendship as tight as unicorns and rainbows. If you're a guy, hide yo junk unless you about day life.

"That 10 year old wanna-be gangster listening to Ludacris is SO BRANDON!"
"My friends call me 'Brandon' now because I have a smoking hot assistant"

by VioletBlueberry June 1, 2017

Brandon

Brandon is a tall goofy lookin motherfucker. He is extremely obnoxious and thinks he’s some sort of smart ass. He’s kind of good at sports but overall a bag of pure shit.

Someone tell Brandon to stfu!

by Verylegitdefs April 2, 2019

Brandon

The ultimate liar. A bully. Sticks his finger up his ass and then smells it. Likes to farmer blow in the house. Crushes up weird shit and shoves it up his nose. Holds the worlds record at the most jobs held for the shortest times yet tells his family he got a promotion

Look at that loser, he must be a Brandon

by Roxyroo May 2, 2019

Brandon

A big headed loser who sucks at Madden!

9 year old boy: Uncle B you are such a loser
Brandon: Trash!!
9 year old boy: U suck at Madden

by fortnitedoodooboiiii July 19, 2019

Brandon

Brandon is the most hottest, sexiest, funniest guy you will ever meet in your life.

You should definitely date anyone who’s name is Brandon.

Brandon your hot as hell.

by ok boomer 12353 November 29, 2019

Brandon

he's just that nigga. that's all you need to know

"Hey, do you know who Brandon is?" "Yeah, he's that nigga"

by yomommacheese July 12, 2019

Brandon

A guy who when you first met them seem really great. But then they turn out to be a complete asshole and wanna be fuckboy. They are very thirsty but swear they respect women. Thye are homophobes and republicans.

Brandon used to be a great friend.... not anymore.

by Litty193 December 30, 2017