Psychology

The biggest joke of a University course ever. Generally consists of about 5 hours a week max with half of those being cancelled every other week. Nearly always taken by those keen to go out and get drunk rather than get a proper degree. Hence students of the course are often referred to as keenos. Highly recommended to those who want to go to University but not do any work, just go out, get smashed and usually sleep with anyone that is a 2/10 or above. Therefore become a stellato when drunk quite often too.

Flatmate: "Are you revising tonight?"

Psychology student: "fuck no!"

Flatmate: "Oh yeah, I forgot you were a psychology student"

by G6 laddd January 12, 2013

psychology

Probably the most bullshit field of study besides liberal arts, pyschology is the field of study of the human mind and how it works(?) The whole study ignores a thing called logic. Since you cannot disect the human brain and study it, idiot scientists pull assumptions out of their asses without backing up their theories. They do this so they can diagnose "freaks" and "abnormal." 99% of assholes who take these class do it to be cool and not look like an idiot when infact it's the complete opposite. People who become pyschologist are assholes who like to diagnosed people who are 'abnormal' so they can pay off their Lexus payments and finish buying that gold yacht.

What really pisses me off about pyschology is that it implies on how everyone should act in some bullshit social set of standards otherwise you have some sort of disorder. Nevermind the fact that there is a thing called disagreements, emotions, and doing what you like. So the whole thing just spews of contradicting bullshit.

I like to be alone and have my own space therefore I have Asperger's Syndrome and Social Anxiety Disorder, what? Oh yea I also am Bi-Polar because when I get pissed off and I don't hold it back. I have ADHD because stuff that I don't like bores me so I don't care much for it.

A typical psychology case: A mother is bringing in her 8 year old daughter because she doesn't like school(who does?). The doctor is a Hindu fresh graduate who just graduated in an online course and can hardly speak English. God knows why he got a job at a health center.

*Doctor looks over new charts after mom writes some bullshit*

Quack: So you can't get along in school and you don't like being there?

Girl: No, school is boring and the other kids are mean to me because I'm the one of the three girls in my class.

Quack: Do you feel down and depressed, do you drink or smoke at all?

Girl: What?

*After a half-hour of nonsensicle questions, the doctor automatically she knows the girl like shes a father and prescribes the little girl with 2 different medicines, one is for seizures(yes for my 'bi-polar' I have been prescribed seizure medicines).*

I love how the doctor automatically assumes that she knows how the girl works and prescribes her useless medications.

by Patch Adams June 17, 2006

psychology

An interesting discipline no doubt, but not without its share of problems. For more on those, see psychologist.

Psychology is good, psychologists are bad.

by smithbones March 3, 2009

nigga psychology

A way of interacting with other races that is commonplace among African Americans. Often involves pretending to be ignorant. Either to act in a political manner or to prevent attending a function or task the user wishes to avoid. Sometimes a user will try to get work done or bills paid using this tactic. Users of the tactic often will say ain't got or can't do I ain't got.

I use to manage a trailer park if you did not get the rent on Friday night you probably not going to ever get it. So we told them we are not like the other managers we are not going to fly around trying to find you we have shit to do we are going to collect or you are going to reject our logic. So Saturday morning when the rent was not collected from our special tenants we went to their unit and knocked on the door. 04:00 knock on that door like a swat team. BLAM BLAM BLAM Tennant "Who is it " Land lord got the rent ! Tennant"It is 4am"great you own a watch you own a calendar too because it is Saturday we were to see you Friday with the rent don't you think it is a little too late to use nigga psychology? tennant "Dam man here is the rent shit man you for real?" Yes we are for real see you next Friday right? Thank you very much enjoy your rest. Next Friday we had 99% collection rate.

by cdltpx August 28, 2013

pop psychology

using your mind to outsmart your soda and prevent it from spraying you; also known as defensive drinking, or thinking before you drink

"If a soda seems to be all shaken up, calm it down by tapping on the top of the can a little bit." ~Pop psychology

by Emerson Crossjostle March 11, 2013

psychology

Something I really dislike. A bunch of people acting like they are superior to you. They think you have "problems" because your mind works differently. THey want to change and mold you into a mindless but happy zombie. I'd rather be realistic. Psychologists think they know you and want to "cure" you. Of things like personality disorders. What if I LIKE my personality disorders? Too bad, it isn't "normal." They automatically assume what your actions mean and judge you. What these xenophobic people fail to realize is that you are equal to them! They have NO sense of humour Their knowledge tends to be all doctrine and no experience. Often judgemental and hypocritical, these people are annoying and hated by most.

Me: I want to rule the world.
Psychologist: Hmm.
Me: I am SO much more intelligent than you.
Psychologist: Insecurity...
Me: It is NOT insecurity!
Psychologist: Denial...
Me: Whatever.
Psychologist: I got it! You have narcissistic personality disorder! For me telling you that, give me a thousand dollars and tons of praise and thanks. I really AM a psychology genius, aren't I?

Me: Ugh.

by Carynne No. January 27, 2007

psychologying

using psychology on someone in order to sway an issue in their favor

Stop psychologying me!

by soulshine1212 October 29, 2014