A religion that posits that an supernatural being created humanity. Said being then decided to kill every human on the planet except a few (Noah and his family)- even though this being KNEW when he made humanity that they would behave in a manner that would compel him to commit, not just genocide, but near extinction of the ENTIRE human race. Later, this god had a “son”. Rut roh- now we’re claiming that God had a “son” but we CAN’T become like those nasty polytheists. Thus the concept of “the Trinity” arose. According to the Christians, god the Father, for some reason, needed Jesus to die because again, humanity is imperfect. Well, Jesus did, in fact die, but according to the Christians, that STILL wasn’t good enough. After he died, people still HAVE to somehow be able to discern and follow the correct minutia of theology. Guess what, even though the son of god (supposedly) died for you sins, if you were born in a non-christian country or to a non-christian family, or if your Christianity is “off” in some nebulous way, god will condemn you to AN ETERNITY of spiritual and physical suffering. All this despite the fact that god supposedly made us to be this way and had the foresight to know this is exactly how we would turn out- nope, an eternity of suffering for you. Also, in America at least, Christianity involves loving guns and flags.
Hey Bob, I love Christianity so I don’t like gay people. Never mind that I ignore literally every other rule in the old testament as well as the entire new testament.
by Kickolaus Nage October 8, 2021
Christianity is a cult.
by Disillusioned Hippie September 26, 2005
A racist religion that has it's origins in Europe. Responsible for most of the crimes in America that is child molesters, child rape , pedophile rings and child pornography. Churches of Christianity often support and are part the organized crimes that are made to promote pedophillia. Passeges in the Bible often condone child rape since Jesus was said to have slept with many.
by Joshyjay2553 May 19, 2018
The belief that an all-knowing all-powerful invisible sky daddy that is everywhere at once made the universe in six days but then got tired so he rested on the seventh day. Christians believe God made a nudist colony with a dust-man and a rib-woman and an evil magic apple tree. The rib-woman gets tempted by a talking snake to eat from the magic apple tree. God gets pissed so he tells them to go fuck themselves. Dust-man and rib-woman have kids who have incest with each other. Fast forward a thousand something years later God gets pissed again because his people forgot he existed (well no shit, he told them to go screw themselves), so he tells a 500 year old dude to build a boat. Somehow two of every type of animal board his boat (you know, they totally walk and fly across the planet), and God sends a global flood to drown everyone except the 500 year old man and his family (including killing the innocent children). Two thousand years later God impregnates a virgin with himself. Human form of himself (Jesus) does all kinds of crazy shit like walk on water, turn water into wine, heal the blind, raise his friend from the dead, etc. Jesus gets crucified and then says "JK suckers, I'm alive" three days later, in order to sacrifice himself to himself for our sins. Most Christians believe that if you believe Jesus was God's son, Jesus died on the cross and rose from the dead, and repent of your sins you get to go to heaven (even if you're a rapist, pedophile, or serial killer).
Today, 1/3 of the people in the world believe in the story of Christianity. People have been executed for not believing in this story or believing in a similar story. Parents have disowned children for not believing in this story. Wars and witch-hunts have been started in the name of this story. Presidents have to lie that they believe in this story to get elected. God bless america!
by TurtleMan58 November 12, 2018
by vulture_queerearth87 May 22, 2019
A great religion that is either misunderstood by ignorant morons or maligned by malevolent assholes.Sometimes a combination of both.Sometimes in the 'guise' of a believer.
Christianity has been much maligned unfairly ever since those Enlightenment assholes who weren't any better than those Dark Ages assholes.Infact they're the same assholes.
by JESUS IS THE MESSIAH December 6, 2005
1. A religion with both teachings of good and evil, yet has been responsible for the majority of the world's evil in the past 2,000 years.
2. A religion whose followers refuse to practice what Jesus Christ teaches.
3. A fairy tale, contradictory in and of itself, written in four contradictory plagiarized versions, of a peasant born to a "virgin" woman who cheated on her fiancé with a deity, was raised by her and a carpenter, grew up to be a magic teacher who did magic acts, died on a cross as a scapegoat for nothing he had done wrong, and rose from the dead as if nothing ever happened.
4. The belief that a cosmic Jewish zombie who was his own father can make you live forever if you symbolically eat his flesh and telepathically tell him you accept him as your master so he can remove an evil force from your soul that is present in humanity because a rib-woman was convinced by a talking snake to eat from a magical tree. Makes perfect sense.
2. A religion whose followers refuse to practice what Jesus Christ teaches.
3. A fairy tale, contradictory in and of itself, written in four contradictory plagiarized versions, of a peasant born to a "virgin" woman who cheated on her fiancé with a deity, was raised by her and a carpenter, grew up to be a magic teacher who did magic acts, died on a cross as a scapegoat for nothing he had done wrong, and rose from the dead as if nothing ever happened.
4. The belief that a cosmic Jewish zombie who was his own father can make you live forever if you symbolically eat his flesh and telepathically tell him you accept him as your master so he can remove an evil force from your soul that is present in humanity because a rib-woman was convinced by a talking snake to eat from a magical tree. Makes perfect sense.
1. Christianity may have been a good religion to begin with, but was perverted by many of its followers when they committed various acts of stupidity and evil.
2. Many Christians today are hypocrites.
3. The Biblical stories, especially Christianity, will one day be sorted into the mythology section along with the ancient Roman and Greek myths, and maybe along with the fairy tale sections.
4. Christianity sounds like a stupid religion if you summarize it like that.
2. Many Christians today are hypocrites.
3. The Biblical stories, especially Christianity, will one day be sorted into the mythology section along with the ancient Roman and Greek myths, and maybe along with the fairy tale sections.
4. Christianity sounds like a stupid religion if you summarize it like that.
by Kiss My Ass, Religion June 13, 2010