my beautiful gorgeous delicious sweet amazing(did i mention beautiful?) wife. jared padalecki is the most gorgeous man on earth n honestly should be the president of our country. he has been gorgeous since the 1990s, his specific peak(controversially) being the 2010s. hes been in many goated movies(may i include house of wax?) including friday the 13th the 2009 remaster(where his moobs were outrageously huge), supernatural(where he had luscious hair), and gilmore girls(where he was an extremely sexy jerk). i could write an entire paragraph on this man. he is so incredibly amazingly amazing amazing amazing it never fails to fly over my head. literally the most delicious man ever. extremely bitable and uh.. may i say extremely arousing. THE MOST BEAUTIFUL MAN EVER. if u don’t agree then you are not the brightest in the bunch.
girl: “bazinga!! jared padaleckis man boobs are huge in this movie, lawd have mercy..”
(straight) boy: “biyaaaatch.. imma straight male but giirl u right, he could tots get it.”
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random: “have u watched supernatural? season 5 sam makes me wanna combust, dear god.”
another random: “yeah, seeing him made me bust in my pants.”
(straight) boy: “biyaaaatch.. imma straight male but giirl u right, he could tots get it.”
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random: “have u watched supernatural? season 5 sam makes me wanna combust, dear god.”
another random: “yeah, seeing him made me bust in my pants.”
by eatsjaredpadaleckischewedgum February 24, 2025
by bignbomb74 April 23, 2021
by Anonymous11121314 January 11, 2018
The best youtubers with the sweetest kids. First son, Jackson born in 2014 after infertility. Second son, Calvin, born 2015. Third son due June 2018. youtube.com/ellieandjared
by imsorrywho? June 17, 2018
A true fuck boy. Normally has a very big head, and a very petite penis. Not to be mistaken for "Jared" Jared VanVleet is a complete douchebag. Also very bad in bed.
by Dictionarywebster April 05, 2016
Jared is a tall man who hit puberty at a young age. He has a huge d**k and the ladies can always see his bulge.
by Jackasswhohatesyouall December 09, 2016
When you’re bored so you decide to cut a hole in your stuffed animal and fuck it until you have rugburn on your cock. You then proceed to lick the cum and eat the cotton inside.
by Yagggahab May 21, 2023