"I didn't just want a Helpful Nub Job, I also wanted just a bit of love too!" Spaceman Scott to Stumbler from Shipwrecked 64
by ReedicusRex November 16, 2024

are you here to help me?
by bunnythetransboy May 19, 2021

Because you can just you can just do what I told you to in relationship to the problem THAT I OUTLINED EXPLICITLY AND NOT THE ONE YOU WANT TO HELP FUCKING "PEOPLE" WITH.
Hym "Why not ask for help? Because you don't actually give help. That isn't a thing I can get from you. All I'm currently getting is bloviating about what 'people' want and I am not fucking 'people' am I? So no. I'm not going to grovel at your feet. You and your entire profession are the worst conceivable people because at least you're kind of allowed to kill the murderers and rapists. And don't say this is 'manipulation' because I don't actually care what you do in response to this. I'm just going to find a kid to kill and kill myself. None of this matters."
by Hym Iam July 27, 2024

When you're moving a large object, and the other person kind of just touches the other end without actually lifting, or putting their hands close to the object as if trying to somehow move it with their mind.
by ';ljm';jm';j';j';k' November 28, 2015

There is no definition of the world "help"
by anonymous February 7, 2022

"It's an Adirondack concept, 'whisper for help,' when you run into an aggressive person that is really attracted to you, you usually give them a half hour to stop and whisper for help" -Roy Hurd, "Greatest Musician Alive"
Listen to Roy Hurd's "Whisper for Help" on the album 'As Real As It Gets" on Spotify, IHeartRadio, iTunes, TuneIn or youtube.
by Wisjd April 18, 2018

The age-old conundrum of "people who seek self-improvement vs. people who need self-improvement" --- generally speaking, the people who are conscientious and unashamedly self-examining enough to actively seek ways to improve themselves do not really need to self-improve very much, whereas the people who truly do need to improve themselves will not admit that they even HAVE a self-inadequacy problem, and so they arrogantly/impatiently refuse to seek or accept help in improving their character or behavior (think, the infamous "getters gettin' got" conversation between Madea and Dr. Phil).
Client, to counsellor, at the outset of their weekly meeting: Breaker one-five for reality check --- come on back?
Counsellor, playing along: Yeah, go ahead, Breaker --- reading you wall-to-wall and treetop-tall.
Client: Thanks --- that's a big ten-four, good buddy. Well, I'm in the process of trying to improve myself, and so I thought I'd send a random shout-out over the waves to check my progress. I've been trying to be more sociable and patient and helpful to everyone, visualize things more from their perspective, and so on.
Counsellor: Well, eights and other good numbers to you on THAT one, good buddy --- that's certainly a positive start. Have you tried self-help books?
Client: Oh, a great BIG ten-four THERE, good buddy --- I've read at least a half-dozen of 'em cover-to-cover, and loved every page; the problem, though, is that I never seem to find any new ideas --- most everything in there is stuff I already know about and am actively practicing, so the books just reassuringly confirm the nature and wisdom of my efforts, not provide fresh perspectives for further improvement.
Counsellor: Ah... well, ten-four, good buddy --- I totally "get you" there... the old "self-help paradox", eh?? The only people who'll read those books are ones who don't need 'em!
Counsellor, playing along: Yeah, go ahead, Breaker --- reading you wall-to-wall and treetop-tall.
Client: Thanks --- that's a big ten-four, good buddy. Well, I'm in the process of trying to improve myself, and so I thought I'd send a random shout-out over the waves to check my progress. I've been trying to be more sociable and patient and helpful to everyone, visualize things more from their perspective, and so on.
Counsellor: Well, eights and other good numbers to you on THAT one, good buddy --- that's certainly a positive start. Have you tried self-help books?
Client: Oh, a great BIG ten-four THERE, good buddy --- I've read at least a half-dozen of 'em cover-to-cover, and loved every page; the problem, though, is that I never seem to find any new ideas --- most everything in there is stuff I already know about and am actively practicing, so the books just reassuringly confirm the nature and wisdom of my efforts, not provide fresh perspectives for further improvement.
Counsellor: Ah... well, ten-four, good buddy --- I totally "get you" there... the old "self-help paradox", eh?? The only people who'll read those books are ones who don't need 'em!
by QuacksO February 3, 2017
