Big Bad Brad (noun): A lumbering, sub-human brute with a bulbous frame and an unnaturally wide base. His thick, fat, calloused hooves are often crammed into women’s footwear. His face, a big, dumb, perfectly round slab of confusion, sits atop his hairy mass, though his scalp remains curiously barren. He speaks in a slow, monotone drawl, as if each word is a struggle against his own stupidity.
Chronically late to work and a walking medical mystery (at least in his own mind), this gutter snipe suffers from an extreme case of hypochondria. His days are punctuated by dramatic medical ailments, followed by frantic calls for an ambulance to ferry him from his own home, only for doctors to confirm, yet again, that absolutely nothing is wrong.
A connoisseur of filth, this swamp-dwelling specimen produces greasy, bile-ridden shits at an alarming rate. He is a walking biohazard, harboring every known strain of hepatitis along with a few that science has yet to discover.
Despite his Neanderthal-like attributes, Brad possesses a shockingly average IQ. However, his dental history suggests a level of neglect that has single-handedly funded his dentist’s children’s college tuition. Though Big Bad Brad’s underwear is often covered in matted hair and shit, he remains a friend to all and, in his free time, a self-proclaimed world-class chiropractor, despite having no formal training or hygiene standards.
Chronically late to work and a walking medical mystery (at least in his own mind), this gutter snipe suffers from an extreme case of hypochondria. His days are punctuated by dramatic medical ailments, followed by frantic calls for an ambulance to ferry him from his own home, only for doctors to confirm, yet again, that absolutely nothing is wrong.
A connoisseur of filth, this swamp-dwelling specimen produces greasy, bile-ridden shits at an alarming rate. He is a walking biohazard, harboring every known strain of hepatitis along with a few that science has yet to discover.
Despite his Neanderthal-like attributes, Brad possesses a shockingly average IQ. However, his dental history suggests a level of neglect that has single-handedly funded his dentist’s children’s college tuition. Though Big Bad Brad’s underwear is often covered in matted hair and shit, he remains a friend to all and, in his free time, a self-proclaimed world-class chiropractor, despite having no formal training or hygiene standards.
Jimmy: Big Bad Brad showed up late again, wheezing like he ran a marathon wearing those damn women’s sneakers.
Melvin: I swear those shoes are crying for help. Probably like his dentist every time he walks in.
Jimmy: Speaking of cries for help, what’s the over/under on his next fake medical emergency?
Melvin: Two hours—max. My money’s on “mystery heart failure” again.
Melvin: I swear those shoes are crying for help. Probably like his dentist every time he walks in.
Jimmy: Speaking of cries for help, what’s the over/under on his next fake medical emergency?
Melvin: Two hours—max. My money’s on “mystery heart failure” again.
by Dwaggerbomb March 1, 2025
Get the Big Bad Bradmug. heyy you know Brad Whitehouse?
"yeah hes Awesome"
Not Awesome, Fucking Awesome"
you know Jake Thompson?
"yeah hes Awesome to"
"yeah hes Awesome"
Not Awesome, Fucking Awesome"
you know Jake Thompson?
"yeah hes Awesome to"
by ImNotGod December 4, 2011
Get the Brad Whitehousemug. by ScottMann August 13, 2017
Get the Brad Pylesmug. 
Brad is sexy sexy dilf that work as a pest killer and specilizes in killing german cokroaches, i want him to pin me down and suck on all my spots until theres no room to suck on me anymore, then i want him to fist me until i can barely funtion.
by bradismworshipper November 5, 2022
Get the Bradmug. by word2thebird December 6, 2018
Get the Bradmug. A Brad is a Caucasian man who takes an action, out of White Privilege, said action would normally would be frowned upon, but a Brad has no social awareness that his action is prejudicing someone else.
by HoneyComb Brown July 8, 2019
Get the Bradmug.