daniel read

An escaped dwarf from the region of lord of the rings. Can easily identify him with painting on his feet, legs, toes. Is mostly intoxicated.

Wow is that Daniel Read? Yeah the guy from Lord of the rings.

by Popenahitsreallycade October 9, 2013

Virginia reading

The verbiage used when someone from Virginia residues in a different state and a person needs to be told the hard, cold truth due to ugly behavior.

"I'm fixin to cuss you Virginia reading style if you don't get outta my face"

by navyvett October 11, 2013

Mastur-reading

Pleasuring one's self to a novel or any form of text that doesn't involve another person. (Not to be confused with sexting)

I spotted an old man mastur-reading in the far corner of the library.

by Creepy Guy in The Library October 15, 2011

Thomas Crewe-Read

Stupid bitch with weird teeth and weird hair that likes to watch small children. He often goes to state school playgrounds in recess with a high-zoom camera and films them going down the slide. He likes it deep.

Parent 1: “Thomas Crewe-Read is here! Fucking protect your kids”

Parent 2: “Damn straight, ni, get that creepy bastard fat 🥷🏿 out of this shithole!”

by SlipperySloshy January 16, 2023

Gossip Read

Used when relating possibly non-factual information you read somewhere.

I gossip read that the Microsoft layoffs are mostly in the marketing department.

by HeyEbeth January 18, 2023

Sandwich-reading

The process of reading the first and last chapter of a book, and then writing an essay about what you think the books insides are.

Educated guesswork using online summary sources are also a viable method of completing sandwich-reading.

I didn't read that book. I was only sandwich-reading it to make sure key points got introduced. I couldn't read the whole thing since I was too busy.

by Somegregoryguy January 23, 2023

read the article

three words commonly used as cannon fire against someone who didn't read the article, and you feel the need to destroy them because you're a vengeful bitch.

Tom: Steven Tyler is innocent until proven guilty. Too many celebs getting railroaded or canceled because of these accusations!

Kelli: well, like, duh. Like, if you would just read the article, you'd know that he admitted to it in his autobiography!

by GG Allin February 2, 2023