Mattress Cracking

When you get too close to the edge of your mattress and it goes in your arse crack.

Mike: Bro, how was your night last night?

Paul: Dude, we got some serious action, but three adults in a single bed? I ended up mattress cracking all night!

by mjmnz April 3, 2022

Mattressexual

Meh·tris·cex·ual~

⠀⠀⠀⠀~adjective~

⠀⠀⠀⠀To be sexually or romantically attracted to the inanimate object commonly referred to as Mattresses ("beds", "bunks", "sacks", etc.) regardless of the item's manufacturer or country of origin.

"Man I gotta hit they hay, ya'know what I mean?"
"For sure! I'm Mattressexual, so I hit it all the time!"

"My friend came out to me last weekend. I knew he was being real with me when he no longer wished to go the fuck to bed, but that he had wished to go to fuck the bed. I accept him greatly for this bravery in coming out as a Mattressexual."

by PsychAnon January 18, 2023

Mastersoak

Guided masturbation. Where a man grabs his own shaft as if he were to choke the chicken. But a woman takes the mans hand/wrist and does the motion for them. Thus, not masturbation.

Tony: Bro, so what did you and Alice do last night?

Samuel: Dude, all we did was mastersoak.

by donald treanor November 6, 2023

new mattress effect

When that new mattress feels like a cloud and you want to sleep all the time.

Origin: In Malcolm in the Middle (Season 7, 146-17), Malcolm and Dewey find a new mattress. Malcolm proceeds to sleep infinitely on the mattress, thus, Malcolm experiences the new mattress effect.

Bob: When I got my new mattress I put myself on mandatory bed rest to enjoy the supremacy over my old one.

Joe: That's the new mattress effect, I've had it too.

Tim: I've slept for three days on my new mattress, I can't tell if it's draining my soul or helping it.

Bob: I'm going through the same thing, it's the new mattress effect.

by Allen75 June 16, 2010

Band Mattress

A person in a band who has slept with a majority of the other members in said band.

Wow, Holly's had sex with everybody in her band.

Well, they don't call her the band mattress for nothin.

by OsamaBinRocken December 22, 2010

nug matter

the remaining smoke able chunks left at the bottom of the bowl after you blow off a layer of ash

zany;hey pack another bowl
fred;hold up there's some nug matter let me Finnish it off

by xanythegreat August 18, 2011

Missouri Mattress

The act of lending your mattress to a friend once you have refused to let them sleep in your room.

Boy: Hey I need to borrow your room tonight...
Girl: No way! #blessed
Boy: Don't CB, she could be the one. What about Missouri compromise?
Girl: I guess we can do Missouri mattress. Thank you!

by Missouri Mattress March 1, 2015