One who wakes up early on saturday morning for the sole purpose of furiously eating (fucking) all of the oven fresh muffins before anyone else can. They also enjoy fucking carrot cake and banana bread.
Bill (to Steve): That J.V. is a muffin fucker extraordinaire.
Steve: It's 5:30AM, better get down stairs before all of those muffins get fucked.
Steve: It's 5:30AM, better get down stairs before all of those muffins get fucked.
by shiteater9000 April 14, 2010
by Lost Bunn February 07, 2017
by E April 16, 2005
Dan: Did you hear what Tarik and Alkhamis did at that party last night?
Dave: Yeah! They're such fatty fuckers! I can't believe it took two of them just to fill that whale's blowhole!
Dave: Yeah! They're such fatty fuckers! I can't believe it took two of them just to fill that whale's blowhole!
by ChewChewTrain January 04, 2011
This is the term used when a child is trying to get on a good sports team, and the mother fucks all the coaches so he will get on.
by Mike Hansen June 21, 2004
one who has sexual intercourse with a deity in order to attain good fortune; also used in a manner to piss off religious people
by Gerald March 01, 2005
A name that is given to any older man, or woman that is hindering your speed, whether you are driving, walking, running (etc.).It is not uncommon for them to possess horrible driving skills, and driving through banks, salons, grocery stores, and gas stations happens more often than not.
Driver: I am going to be late, get out of my way Turtle Fucker!
Grocery Shopper: Move you damn Turtle Fucker and quit staring at the laxatives, it's not that damn hard to decide!
Grocery Shopper #2: It shouldn't take that long to write a check, get some glasses Turtle Fucker!
Grocery Shopper #3: Damn-it Turtle Fucker, no it isn't cheaper than that, quit getting price checks!
Betty drove into the gas station and injured the clerk because she is a Turtle Fucker.
Grocery Shopper: Move you damn Turtle Fucker and quit staring at the laxatives, it's not that damn hard to decide!
Grocery Shopper #2: It shouldn't take that long to write a check, get some glasses Turtle Fucker!
Grocery Shopper #3: Damn-it Turtle Fucker, no it isn't cheaper than that, quit getting price checks!
Betty drove into the gas station and injured the clerk because she is a Turtle Fucker.
by loafenator February 28, 2009