tablescape

Designing a dining table (for a dinner party) with useless, cheap and tacky knicknacks, usually with some kind of lame-assed theme. And usually they are nowhere as inexpensive as she likes to claim. Allegedly created by Food Network hack Sandra "Semi-Homemade" Lee.

Sandra: Tarqueesha, since you are my black friend, and I am making dinner in your honor in celebration of Black History Month, I've made for you the MOST AWESOME tablescape that you are going to llllllove! I've placed "Colored" and "White" stickers to each chair in tribute of the dark days of Jim Crow and I got all black flatware from the dollar store. My chandelier has hanging ropes I got from a friend whose parents were in the KKK, to honor those who were lynched for the cause, my sister. AND I've put my flowers into empty malt liquor bottles. Just for you, sweetie.

Tarqueesha: Bitch, your white ass is whacked. Don't make me punch you. Fuck you and your lame semi-homemade ass. (Tarqueesha then punches Sandra in the face and knocks her semi-homemade ass OUT. Word.)

by Mixed Race Kid April 13, 2008

Tablefigging

A fetish wherein one derives pleasure from watching Teenage Boys Looking at Lesbian Fisting Guides (TBLLFG). (Incidentally, the psychological term for this would be Puerostudiosappho - pugnusdoctrinophilia -- or something)

I was totally tablefigging at the Bentonville library the other day when I came across two brothers hiding in the stacks flipping through "The Whole Lesbian Sex Book."

by SFMattyG May 17, 2007

Table of Indie

Emo - Scene - Indie - Hipster - Metro

A table helping to identify a specific subcategory of human, usually male.

Nathaniel: you are far to the left on the Table of Indie, Jesse. Don't lie to yourself.
Jesse: but i still get the chicks.
Nathaniel: ...

by Jesse Earl Sterling Lerch June 1, 2006

carlosed at the table

To accidently cum in public, basically, comes from the hangover, from the quote, "Not at the table carlos!"

Jeremy carlosed at the table in english class!

by CARLOS!!!!!! August 28, 2010

Table Five

adj. gross; v. to vomit

"I saw that fat girl back there with no shirt on...table five."

"It made me want to table five."

by Amelia April 6, 2005

table whore

Someone who goes from table to table in a cafeteria or restaurant, not spending much time in any one spot.

Not necessarily an actual skank (but can be).

"Hey guys mind if I sit here for a sec?"

"Weren't you just at that table in the corner over there? And that one at the window?"

"Well yeah... But-"

"Sorry we don't allow table whores at our table."

by Peace:) March 28, 2010

tabletopping

The act of playing a tabletop role playing game or similar game.

When are we tabletopping at Bill's? We've got a dragon to slay.

by Nick E. December 8, 2006