Morning Scroll of Shame

The scroll through your text messages and photos the morning after a drunken night. This is where you can remember what happened throughout the night by viewing your drunken selfies and drunk text messages, most likely to an ex boyfriend/girlfriend.

You better check your morning scroll of shame to figure out what happened last night.

by TokenWhiteGirl November 9, 2014

Morningwood blues

The strong emotional sensation associated with morning wood, or waking up with a boner. It usually results in minor depression and having to pee, only cured by a severely guilt inducing masturbation session to underaged midget porn.

Santiago: aye, compadre, I almost killed my self after watching Lisa Ann take it from a ten year old three footer but it was the only way to get rid of that often morningwood blues.

Phil- whatever man, Ya gotta do what u you gotta do.

by Shazeef January 8, 2015

Morning Marble

The female analog to morning wood. When a woman wakes up horny and with an erect clitoris. Usually results in the morning rape of her significant other, or some random passer-by.

Woke up with morning marble today... surprised the shit out of the mailman.

by alfalfa31 January 30, 2016

Morning wood

When a man wakes up to go pee in the morning and misses the toilet because his Woody is happy asf

*birds chirping* *guy yawning*

Guy: good morning sunshine

* Walks to the toilet and pulls down pj's*

Guy: I just need to pee real quick then I'll go to work. *pissssssssssss* *misses*

AWWWW FUCK NOT AGAIN, I GOT FUCKING Morning Wood

by Just_a_guy_named_grandpa April 9, 2016

Morning Cardio

Morning sex so vigorous and intense that it’s equal to a heart racing, pulse pumping cardio workout.

Did you hit the gym this morning braaaaahhhh? No broooooohhh got in some morning cardio before I left the house.

by Eaton Holgoode October 25, 2018

Morning Wood

You get out of bed and you have one. Luckily, none of your fam is there to see it so you good.

Bobby was at a friend’s house for a sleepover. In the morning, his friend had morning wood. This was an uncomfortable situation for Bobby.

by Shrekcanneverbereplaced May 23, 2019

Last morning

Somewhere between 'last night' and 'this morning'; When you're up so late that you don't go to bed until after the sun has come up.

Bro 1: You should have gone home with that girl last morning.

Bro 2: Not a chance, bro. I can't get my freak on when the birds are chirping.

by slim415 December 15, 2009