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retarded monkey fuck

Someone who constantly repeats the same lame joke they've already told you 3,000 million times before, expecting that the 3,001 millionth time you're bound to laugh.
Retarded Monkey Fuck: Hey, what's brown and sticky?
Other Guy: I don't know, jackass. Why don't you tell me?
Retarded Monkey Fuck: A stick! Haha!
Other Guy: I'm so glad I have zoloft...
by Gerbilweebies April 29, 2005
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Fuck the monkey

To be the start of something horrible. The cause of something devastating.
Judy is pissed at me for giving her a computer virus, but someone sent it to me first. I didn't fuck the monkey.

The world now has AIDS because somebody fucked the monkey.
by ElDonzo May 29, 2015
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fucked-up fuckup monkey fuck

Phrase made necessary by those people or situations that have surpassed conventional methods of assessment.

fucked up Def #1/5 fuck up Def #4 monkey fuck Def #1

1. An inept person who is totally incapable of living without fucking up or messing up everything within their grasp.
One whose actions has culminated in the acheivement of this, the highest plateau of fucking up.
2. When a situation is completely messed up from a-z and there is zero chance of recovery.
1. They put a fucked-up fuckup monkey fuck in charge who had no idea how to manage, so the place went tits-up.
2. The whole job had been ruined by mismanagement. There was absolutely nothing correct, and it was beyond salvage. It was a total fucked-up fuckup monkey fuck.
by T. Walsh / Ronan XVII January 4, 2005
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monkey fuck

v. to light a cigarette with one that is already burning. (I take issue with the other definition because it does not use the phrase verbally)
by Shabba December 17, 2004
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Reverse Monkey Fuck

While hanging from a pull up bar you insert your erect phallus into the anus of a male/female while she/he a fecal nugget is crowning out of the rectum.
She was about to shit while i was doing pull ups so i reverse monkey fucked her
by The Shit Stuffer July 13, 2009
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Monkey fuck

When you light one cigarette off another cigarette.
Shit dude, my lighters dead... Mind if I get a monkey fuck?
by Jason Mark Smith December 27, 2007
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Fuck a monkey

1. An exclamation of frustration
2. An exclamation of awesomeness
3. A dismissal
4. To totally suck at something
5. Something you say when there's nothing else to say
6. To have sexual intercourse with a primate
1. "Why won't this thing work??? Argh, fuck a monkey!"
2. "How 'bout that GWAR concert last night?" "Fuck a monkey, that was awesome!"
3. Dumbass walking in on conversation: "You like GWAR??? You guys are sickos!" Guys: "Oh, go fuck a monkey!"
4. *Awkward silence* "Fuck a monkey!"
5. "Man, I fuck a monkey at this!"
6. "I gotta go to the zoo and fuck a monkey."
by Blood Seraph December 13, 2008
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