Russian inquisition

When you go down on a girl who didn't tell you she were on her period AKA when there's a lot of unexpected red she shall then scream "Nobody expects the russian inquisition!"

GUY: Let me lick you good!
GIRL: Yes baby
GUY: WTF why u bleeding!!? U on ur period or something?!
GIRL: Nobody expects the RUSSIAN INQUISITION!!!

by ASND January 31, 2017

Spanish Inquisition

A Spanish Inquisition is when someone puts some part of their body in your butthole suddenly and without warning. Based on Monty Python’s “No one expects the Spanish Inquisition”.

No one expects the Spanish Inquisition.

by Road Warrior+Manny February 8, 2020

Spanish inquisition

Something nobody expects

Talking and the Nobody expects the Spanish inquisition

by kingofminetn May 29, 2022

Ivory Inquisition

An even more active and extreme version of the Ivory Court—not merely adjudicating knowledge claims but actively policing, persecuting, and purging those who violate orthodoxies. Where the ivory court judges, the ivory inquisition investigates, condemns, and punishes. It hunts heretics—not just those who are wrong, but those who challenge fundamental tenets, who ask forbidden questions, who refuse to bow to disciplinary authority. The ivory inquisition operates through public denunciations, coordinated campaigns, institutional discipline, career destruction, and the systematic exclusion of the unorthodox from the community of the legitimate. It's the academy's shadow self, the institution that exists not to seek truth but to defend its own power to define it.

Example: "He wasn't just criticized—he was investigated, denounced, and driven from his position for asking questions the field had declared settled. Not peer review, but Ivory Inquisition: the academy burning its heretics."

by Dumu The Void March 14, 2026