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blow me like a trumpet

A nifty phrase you can drop in the workplace that is sure to offend the ultra tight-ass crowd who have difficulty with crude references to body parts or sex.
Why of course it was entirely impulsive, inappropriate and sadly unprofessional for me to state, “well they can blow me like a trumpet!” - I should have better assessed my audience!
by Dr Bunnygirl July 17, 2020
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trumpet swag

the swag in whch all trumpet players posses
that guys got some serious swag" "well yeah, hes a trumpet player, hes got trumpet swag
by creedence500 August 15, 2010
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Trumpet's ego

Bigger than the universe...
gets all the solos
the solos fuel the ego to grow bigger and better >:D
How the Trumpet's ego works...
Ex:Trumpets are better than Clarinets
Ex:Trumpets are better than Sax
Ex:Trumpets are better than trombones
Ex:Trumpets are better than flutes
Ex:Trumpets are better than oboes
Ex:Trumpets are better than percussion...
Ex:Trumpets are better than (insert instrument here)
by Levi Strauss & CO™ December 8, 2017
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Trumpet grief

When mr grief steals your trumpet
“Dude used to be spanner grief but now the kunt has stolen my trumpet, he’s now known as fucking trumpet grief. Absolute fucking wank stain
by Iwannariot March 14, 2019
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rustic trumpet

Pertaining to the sound(s) of unintended flatulence during anal copulation.
"She kept accidentally farting while I was ass fucking her, and it sounded like a chorus of rustic trumpets!"
by downpat75 August 3, 2008
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Arse-Trumpet

A Utensil made of brass around 1ft. long with mouthpeace and tapered nossle used for the anal administration of cocain.
Favoured by the brittish royal family in the 18th and 19th century who had servants to blow the cocain through the device.
"Butler, fetch my arse-trumpet"
by Dr. Poppenstein June 11, 2006
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Underwater Trumpet

A sexual maneuver in which a man ejaculates into a woman's vagina and farts either at the same time or immediately thereafter ejaculation, but before withdrawing.
"He just gave me an underwater trumpet. It was vile."
by nayqueenie May 13, 2010
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