Premature shooting

When you cum too soon only to see that your gf is disappointed and broke up with you.

Guy 1: My girlfriend broke up with me.
Guy 2: Why?
Guy 1: When I was nailing her it was all fine until I had premature shooting and she was disappointed because I had a microshaft.
Guy 2: Take some Viagra.

by Urbanned September 8, 2015

Premature Ejaculotion

1. When your hand lotion (or any lotion) explodes before you are ready to use it.

2. When lotion squirts out of the pump in an unexpected and undesired location.

1. Person: Fuck, my hand lotion is all over the inside of my bag - talk about premature ejaculotion.

2. Person: Eff, there is ejaculotion all over the floor, where is a towel?

by KC Royals November 30, 2011

Premature Evacuation

Having to get off the toilet faster than desired because one of your young children has to use the potty.

I was a victim of premature evacuation because Timmy needed to use the potty.

by Daddydef February 20, 2015

premature ejaculation

Usually you cannot control it, its when a woman is someone you think is hot and she does something sexually arousing like spanking her ass, then you just let it go uncontrollabley.

Hot Girl: Hey y'all!

Boy: Damnit I had premature ejaculation.

by premature ejaculation happens September 8, 2009

Premature Esnackulation

When you buy a large amount of snack food as a stash, then proceed to eat it all at once.

I try not to buy much junk food when I do groceries, my boyfriend suffers from premature esnackulation.

by JuggLife May 31, 2016

premature epublication

The act of accidentally posting a thought, link, pic, blog, etc. online, and not able to delete and repost because a thread of comments have already started in response to it.

Dammit, I sent out another premature epublication?!?

I posted a picture of my girlfriend, and I tagged her with another girl's name! Five seconds later I had 10 comments letting me know what a douche I was!

by mpdouchebag November 19, 2009

premature launch

To have an over abundance of waste in one’s stomach from excessive indulgence in alcoholic beverage consumption and overeating, causing an uncontrollable movement in the bowels.

Roger: “what the hell is that un-godly smell?”
Nick: “Those two bowls of raisin bran I consumed last night almost caused me a premature launch this morning when I woke up”

by Nicky New Castle July 4, 2021