Crusty Carpet

You ejaculate in a girls pubic hair and let it dry out.

She doesnt wash it for a week.

"hey john, hows your wifes pubes?"
"Last night I gave her a crusty carpet"

"YEAH BOOOOIIIIIII"

by Mr. Nips March 4, 2012

carpet shower

an uncomfortable shower in a bathroom fully carpeted floors walls even the bathtub

guy 1 dude sorry i just got out of my carpet shower
guy 2 what!?

guy 1 i had my bathroom fully carpeted

guy 2 oh god

by minniladds December 3, 2019

carpet flash

When a girl flashes her pubes to another individual

When i was pulling down my pants, i accidentally carpet flashed my friend.

by daflashers April 1, 2015

Carpet Massage

When a man uses his hand(s) to please a woman.

Instead of a carpet munching tonight how about just a carpet massage?

A carpet massage a day keeps the bitch away

If you're not ski poling you're carpet massaging

by ldylumps October 19, 2012

Carpet Dope

Dope made from the fibers of carpet. Usually a carpet & coke mixture will give a economic high to those less fortunate people living in urban cities

Terrell got a hold of some carpet dope the other night. We snorted it all night long and didnt even have to break a $100.

by Moose Twat March 28, 2021

Carpet Mafia

Another term for crabs/pubic lice

Below average girl: so we hooking up for tonight?

Average guy: sorry, I got carpet mafia.. not tonight.

by CharaChan July 10, 2021

tragic carpet

when someone’s (usually a female’s) carpet or pubic region is not shaven at all, to the point of full bush or shaven very poorly

When I went down on her, her tragic carpet turned me gay and made me miss the homies.

by CEO of BDE June 8, 2020