Ted’s Law

The law that, in generality and absent mitigating circumstances or context, “the fact that you have to say ‘they’re not that bad’ means that they are that bad.”

First published after extensive research into the sexually available women of Boston, MA in the 2012 Seth MacFarlane film Ted, spoken by the eponymous Ted, whom MacFarlane also voiced.

Ted:
Look, all I'm saying is that Boston women are, on the whole, a paler, uglier sort than women from the elsewheres of life.

John:
That's bullshit. What about Lori? She's hot.

Ted:
No, Lori's from Pennsylvania. That's not a Boston girl.

John:
They're not that bad.

Ted:
See, the fact that you have to say "they're not that bad" means that they are that bad.

Guy watching the movie: So that’s where Ted’s Law comes from!

by me.....really May 7, 2021

Ted

An annoying brat.

"You got any games on your phone?"
"oh, you're such a Ted"

by Dababycarhahahredissuslessgoo September 19, 2021

Ted

The platypus on the Australian 20 cent piece( commonly called tails)

I call ted

by Notben36364578 November 30, 2018

Ted

Ted can always leg press more than anyone else but can never spell words like "zoo".

"oh hi ted are you leg pressing 600kg"

ted: "yeah I just went to the zo."

by teds secret lover February 24, 2025

Ted

Stand Ted on your school bag.

I'm having a rough Ted right now.

by LiptonIceTeaGreen December 3, 2021

Ted Phenomenon

When you have a really good idea, don’t know it’s good, and just slap it on a sketch.

“I’m just gonna call it a Ted Phenomenon, it’s good but what are you doing with it?!”

by Lumiac April 7, 2020

Ted

More commonly known as Sped, Tedsticles, or even a combination; Spedsticles, Ted is a midget, obsessed with explosives, aircraft, boats, cars, guns, cannons, overall destroying stuff, and most importantly, Among Us; which he fondly calls: "Amogus"

"Ted's so annoying!"
"That's why we call him Spedsticles you fuckhead"

by HammyShoe July 8, 2024