Injured Snail

For those of us who are spectacularly slow - both physically and/or mentally (god help you if you're both!)

So not just a snail (renowned for their lack of speed) but one going slower than normal due to injury. Which is pretty slow.

Urmmm - I'm feeling a bit of an injured snail now, so bear with me...

Ok here we go.

A: "You know, they've taken gullible out of the dictionary?"

B: "Really! Woah!"

A: laughs.

B: what? (thinks desperately for a few mins) Oh I get it! I've been gullible! Ha ha!

A: "blimey you're quick aren't you?"

B: Really!

A: "No. You've got the mental pace of an injured snail!"

by Remakulingo March 10, 2009

Snail-Eyed

(Verb) When ones penis shrivels up inside ones body after witnessing a painful or traumatic event, especially penis inflicted.

(A man is running and slips, planting his face into the wall).

William: Ohhh ouch! That was brutal.
Robert: Uhhh, I totally just Snail-Eyed.

by TheShiningRod May 19, 2014

Snail

Another word for a homeless person, as they carry their home on their back.

Look at that snail over there pissing in Costa coffee’s doorway!

by Thedodgytaxidriver October 10, 2017

Floppy snail

Someone who has a small ugly penis that is unable get erect.

Person 1: ... And they had a floppy snail.
Person 2: I'm so sorry.
Person 1: Damn snail flops.

by Eneunoic September 24, 2021

Gary The Snail

The act of a woman rubbing her wet vagina on a mans body from neck to penis leaving a residue like Gary the snail.

Can't wait for her to Gary The Snail my chest.

by ReaperJK April 29, 2021

Snail

To put two fingers in the anus and a fist in the vagina; resembles a snail.

"Nathan just snailed me so hard last night!"
"Oh my god! Did you leave a snail trail?"
"Fuck yea m8"

by aregnilrac July 7, 2015

The snail

A sexual move where the woman is in all fours (optional) and the partner licks her body, in a continuous movement, from her vagine up to her forehead passing through the anus, leaving behind a trail of bodily fluids, namely fecal matter, much like a snail.

- "Man, I totally did 'The snail' with that bitch Ashley last night"
- "Sir, this is a Wendy's"

by Rita_Albuquerque April 24, 2021