Leaf Blower

A highly selective diagnostic tool for identifying mental illness manifesting in passive aggressive behaviour.

In the susceptible user casual experimentation rapidly becomes highly addicting in the face of obviously infuriated neighbours or family members.

Addicted users experience waves of euphoric release and fantastical notions of relevance as they feel themselves impinging upon the peaceful mindset of their victims.

Ironically it is the users who suffer most from the relentless high decibel exposure. Immediately after using feelings of power blend with even greater internal rage in an often explosive and confusing cocktail of emotions, beyond the users surface level comprehension.

In the past lawnmowers were frequently abused in a similar manner, but the addiction was self limiting as the grass did not immediately grow back to where it had just been, thus invalidating the moral pretext for destroying other peoples happiness.

I am using the leaf blower because I am a hard working person who is therefore morally superior to you, even though I am plainly a psychopath

by Simple Simon met a pieman March 17, 2023

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