Cats

Okay, so imagine a small, carnivorous, usually furry house pet with a long ass tail and alien eyes that may seem all sweet and cuddly at first, then imagine it turning into a heartless fucker that think it’s slick shit ignoring you, scratching you, pissing on stuff, thinking it rules the entire house, treating you like nothing more than its bitch and licking its fat ass all day. Yeah, that’s a cat.

Girl: So do you like dogs?
Guy: Yes.
Girl: Rabbits?
Guy: Yes.
Girl: Mice?
Guy: Yes.
Girl: Rats?
Guy: Yes.
Girl: Monkeys?
Guy: Yes.
Girl: Pandas?
Guy: Yes.
Girl: Cats?
Guy: Fuck no!

This is just a joke. I love cats and in fact have 2 of my own. Please don’t kill me.

by The only name not in use July 28, 2018

Cat

Not a dog

Definition of cat: not a dog

by Plottwistbitches August 3, 2018

will unclog a toilet and clean up cat-puke

One of the "prime" features that any sensible-minded gal --- especially one with one or more furry feline companions --- secretly jopes to see in a guy's "about me" details when perusing the personals ads.

Ladies, if a dude whom you're dating treats you respectfully and is a cheerful-natured helper and therefore "will unclog a toilet and clean up cat-puke" without grumbling or without even being asked to do it, hang onto him for dear life --- he's d-e-f-i-n-i-t-e-l-y a "keeper", hands down!

by QuacksO August 4, 2018

Cat snuggle

When a girl hugs a guy and snuggles on his chest very sexually and lovingly while hugging or laying down on the guy’s chest when he’s laying down too.

She totally cat snuggled me and I like her now.

Boy: That was a good cat snuggle girl. Do you like me?
Girl: I wanna spend my whole life with you because you’re such a sweetheart babe.
Boy: I like you. You know that?
Girl: I already knew it.

by Justicewithtacosandweed August 12, 2018

Mean game of cat and goose

The definition derived from the age old tribe or the roseheath mans. When one mans says to another mans that he isn’t not trying to not woo his other mans woman.

Mans tryina play a mean game of cat and goose.

by Cat and goose mans August 20, 2018

Filthy Cat

a synonym to the popular term dirty dog

James: Wow I can't believe she did that!
Aaron: I know she's a filthy cat...

by Dr.Dish August 21, 2018

cat war

a conflict between two housemates owning separate cats, brought on by these cats not getting along. Aggressions range from petty arguments between roommates, to outright forcing one roommate to pay a hefty vet bill due because their cat gave the other person's cat fleas.

Dude, I'm sorry my cat Snuggles pissed all over your cat Tigger's food dish, but do we really have to get into a cat war over this?

by catmaster8675309 August 22, 2018