My Name is Craig Tucker

My name is Craig Tucker. Last week was my birthday, my grandma gave me a check for 100 dollars. I was so happy. But then, 4 kids from my school came to my house, and said I should use my 100 dollars to invest in becoming a Peruvian flute band. they promised I would double my money in one afternoon. But the government arrested us, along with all the other Peruvian flute bands, and took us to an internment camp in Miami. We begged to go home, but instead the government told us they were sending us to Peru. And so that is why I'm now in Peru. if I die let it be known it is because of 4 guys I don't even like from my school lied to me and took my birthday money.
Jon & Garfield: "hi there who r u"
Craig: "My name is Craig Tucker. Last week was my birthday, my grandma gave me a check for 100 dollars. I was so happy. But then, 4 kids from my school came to my house, and said I should use my 100 dollars to invest in becoming a Peruvian flute band. they promised I would double my money in one afternoon. But the government arrested us, along with all the other Peruvian flute bands, and took us to an internment camp in Miami. We begged to go home, but instead the government told us they were sending us to Peru. And so that is why I'm now in Peru. if I die let it be known it is because of 4 guys I don't even like from my school lied to me and took my birthday money."
by TheTurkeeFlee March 06, 2024
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Tucker's Bowtie

Where a highly-improbable and sometimes *possible* conclusion is believed over much more probable conclusions due to a combination of either (a) Not wanting to recognize an inconvenient truth, and/or (b) Wanting the fantastical to be true.

Commonly the opposite to Occam's Razor.

Named after Tucker Carlson and the predisposition of conservatives to spew and believe in far-fetched conspiracy theories.
Person A: "I believe aliens are real!"

Person B: "You're committing a Tucker's Bowtie"
by JimothyJoeBob August 12, 2022
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Tucker Swindler

Tucker Swindler the guy all girls want tall with broad shoulders and a smile that’ll make you cry he’s so cute and charming with a sense of humor at the same time his laugh lights up the whole room but I’ll have to fight for that
Omg Leeanne look at Tucker Swindler over there he’s so HOT!!!!
by Makk 247068 December 09, 2019
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Frank Tucker

"Here comes Frank Tucker better shut off the radios and shut the door." "He is such a fun nazi"
by Jhaller September 08, 2008
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Dumb Tucker

Australian slang for a shirt without any sleeves, or any kind of vest.
"We're out here at Sheila's Wedding, Todd turns up with a Dumb Tucker on, and they wouldn't let him in!"
by One Credit Ben February 07, 2025
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