Tingly Taint

The tingly sensation you get in your taint when you get overly excited.

Me: Hey Marko guess what?!

Marko: what?!

Me: My taint is uncontrollably tingling because I just found a fucking 5 speed Maxima SE, so rare..i love when I have Tingly Taint"

by ellendefuckinggenrous May 12, 2011

Taint Slam

An extremely unfortunate event.

I just found out I owe $3800 in taxes this year - what a taint slam.

My ex-girlfriend is dating my brother - taint slam!

by thorass March 24, 2011

Taint Heathen

Taint Heathen (n.) - One, male or female, who applies constant oral pressure to that special area that lies between the anus and the scrotum on the male body during fornication

I'm tellin' ya man, in that three-way last night, I was railin' Bitch #1 while I had Bitch #2 play my Taint Heathen.

by SportySport July 8, 2009

taint-painter

The antonym of a no-wipe. When you take a shit and it's so messy, you find yourself scrubbing your taint clean because it's been painted brown.

Me: "Hey Dave, I just had the opposite of a no-wiper this morning. I had myself a taint-painter. I had to shower afterwards."

Dave: "That's awesome."

by j0hnnyscene July 17, 2011

Taint of Dawn

Similar to the grundle of dawn; the taint of dawn comes just prior to the ass crack of dawn. The taint of dawn is between the hours of 3am - 5am, and only applies when you must wake up between these hours.

I had to wake up at the taint of dawn to catch my flight.

Good thing i woke up at the taint of dawn and got out before that whore woke up!!!

by Maddog and J'Rod January 11, 2009

auxiliary taint

A secondary taint which is located between the anus and tail (or tailbone).

"Holy crap! Jacob just tried to lick that cat's butthole but he missed and licked it's auxiliary taint instead! Brutal!"

by Rufus Spivens August 13, 2012

taint rag

A hand or face towel used to polish up the rectal area after leaving a sloppy wet stinker in the toilet.

guy 1: Fuck it! What is this brown stain on my face towel?

guy 2: Oh, my bad, I thought that was a taint rag. I had to do some maintenance after that sloppy wet turd I just unloaded in your crapper.

by Jag Joke March 2, 2009