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Canada's History

The act of inserting a penis into a toaster to heat thing's up in the bedroom or re-energize yourself for even more hot sex. Formerly known as the Beaver, but the term was thought to be too dirty.
I came so many times last night with my girl that I had to preform Canada's History to get myself back into the game.
by FortheColbertNation February 4, 2010
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Canada's History

A term referring to the past of the GREAT nation of Canada. However, some mistaken it with a sex act due to misinformation from Stephen Corbert.
Stephen Corbert does not know about Canada's History.
by IamCanadianCheers February 4, 2010
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Canada's History

the sexual act of pouring maple syrup on ones genitals while sticking moose antlers in your ass and urethra while singing Oh Canada
yesterday joe and i canada's history'd all night long with this homeless man
by mtw800 February 4, 2010
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Canada's History

Lamest magazine in Canada. And Canada has no history anyways.
Steven Colbert- "Canada's history can suck my beaver."
by AbsoIuteZero February 4, 2010
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Canada's History

The act of digging up a significant figure in the history of Canada (preferably a French Canadian) , then pouring maple syrup into one of the body's orifices , letting it ferment, and then drinking the product. Then, while intoxicated from the intense beverage, one must listen to the Titanic theme song while simultaneously forcing a live Canadian to slap you with a copy of The Beaver.

If you want to get a girlfriend involved, you must give her a hockey stick and let her put it anywhere she wants.
Person 1: Hey man, why are you limping?

Person 2: Oh man, last night, my girlfriend watched the Colbert Report and wanted to try out a little bit of Canada's History.
Person 1: But how did you get Celine Dion to come over to your house?
Person 2: We threatened to bomb a poutine factory. Being Canadian, she believed us. And, well, anyways I should probably get my stomach pumped since I drank an entire bowl of maple syrup fermented in the stomach of Tecumseh.
Person 1: The Indian?
Person 2: Yup.
by ColbertNation0985 February 4, 2010
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Canada's History

A sex act first proposed by Sir Dr. Stephen T. Colbert, D.F.A. He suggested that it would involve moose antlers, maple syrup, and the Stanley Cup, but left the rest up to users of the internet.

Canada's history is performed by pressing moose antlers into a woman's vagina and rubbing it with them for initial stimulation. After about three minutes, the maple syrup is applied as a lubricant (WARNING: this is not advised). The two people engage in sexual intercourse in whichever position they like. When the man reaches a climax, he ejaculates into the Stanley Cup and the woman drinks the semen from the cup.

There are surely other, much more depraved versions of Canada's History, but this is the basic version.
Stephen: "I heard Sam and Jason did Canada's History last night!"

Jon: "Woah, freaky."
by What the Fuck Robot February 4, 2010
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canada's history

A sexually deviant act, prevalent in the American Midwest, in which two crack-addicted prostitutes are simultaneously penetrated by a mounted pair of moose antlers (often involving double-penetration if the spread of the antler tines permit). Then, each prostitute drinks as much maple syrup as she is physically able. They then must cause themselves to vomit the syrup into the Stanley Cup, which is placed some feet away, all without causing the moose antlers to be 'coughed out' from their respective orifices. The prostitute who first scores a "basket" into the trophy with her maple-syrup vomit wins, and gets to live. The loser is killed and disposed of in a dumpster behind a truck stop. Note that coughing out her antler is grounds for disqualification.

This is most often performed on April 17th, in observance of the signing the Canada Act by Elizabeth II in 1982.
The congressman was indicted for his participation in Canada's history in a motel room off route 5.
by Archibald P. Fillibuster February 4, 2010
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