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Jared

A fucking adopted cunt who thinks hes the shit. Beat his ass god damn it
Jared:I'm cool
The boys: Shut up jared your fucking adopted!
by Diabetic surgeon October 15, 2019
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Jared

“Yo you see that boy over there?”
“Who Jared?”
Yeah he’s suppppper gay”
by Hellacool99 December 23, 2018
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jared padalecki

my beautiful gorgeous delicious sweet amazing(did i mention beautiful?) wife. jared padalecki is the most gorgeous man on earth n honestly should be the president of our country. he has been gorgeous since the 1990s, his specific peak(controversially) being the 2010s. hes been in many goated movies(may i include house of wax?) including friday the 13th the 2009 remaster(where his moobs were outrageously huge), supernatural(where he had luscious hair), and gilmore girls(where he was an extremely sexy jerk). i could write an entire paragraph on this man. he is so incredibly amazingly amazing amazing amazing it never fails to fly over my head. literally the most delicious man ever. extremely bitable and uh.. may i say extremely arousing. THE MOST BEAUTIFUL MAN EVER. if u don’t agree then you are not the brightest in the bunch.
girl: “bazinga!! jared padaleckis man boobs are huge in this movie, lawd have mercy..”

(straight) boy: “biyaaaatch.. imma straight male but giirl u right, he could tots get it.”



random: “have u watched supernatural? season 5 sam makes me wanna combust, dear god.”

another random: “yeah, seeing him made me bust in my pants.”
by eatsjaredpadaleckischewedgum February 24, 2025
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National Attack Jared Block Day

November 6th: A day where Jared Block can be attacked verbally in any way shape or form as long as there is no physical violence involved.
So glad to be alive on this day, National Attack Jared Block Day, where we can call Jared any mean name in the book and not be reprimanded. #thankful
by laparth November 5, 2020
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National Attack Jared Block Day

November 6th: A day where any verbal attack on Jared R. Block is permitted as long as no physical harm is done.
Glad to be alive on National Attack Jared Block Day! I've been waiting all year to attack that annoying man baby!
by laparth November 5, 2020
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Jared Laing

Jared is a tall man who hit puberty at a young age. He has a huge d**k and the ladies can always see his bulge.
"Look at him you can see it his name must be Jared Laing"
by Jackasswhohatesyouall December 8, 2016
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Jared

Having the name Jared is basically having reached the end you are the best you have achieved everything if your name is Jared by the time you have completed life you will have made boris Johnson shut the fuck up you would have made infinate funny season of modern family you have in vented the infinate money machine you have defeated all these 9 year old internet clown who have supported jake Paul and Bryce hall and most importantly you have taken everyones girl on earth
Oh another Jared just stole my ting well he’s Jared he is a sexy beast it is natural
by Best defffonitions July 31, 2021
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