John

the best person in the planet. He's tall, pale and hot. Many girls are begging for him to be theirs, but he's already taken. Everybody loves him. When he walks on a street, many people would ask for his autograph. When he steps in a shop, people ask him to take pictures with him. He has good hygiene and he owns 15 cars. He lives in a palace with his dog and his girlfriend

girl1: omg i have a new crush
girl 2: he must be mid
girl1: no, he's a john
girl2: WAIT WHAT?!?!?!? IM CRUSHING ON HIM TOO

boy 1: so many girls are simping for john, why not us!?!
boy 2: maybe because we're not john
boy1: damn i want to be a john

"Hes so rich, popular, hot and amazing! he must be a john"

by thatonereallycoolhotperson June 8, 2023

Porta John

The biggest nigga you ever met. Smells like a absolute piece of dog ass. Chill homie but sucks dick.

Damn Porta John, when’s the last time you took a shower you fat fuck.

by Sillyboy69 October 15, 2022

Curse of John the Dog

The very definition of a curse. It will begin by looking into the accursed John the Dog's eyes. This curse will affect your whole bloodline by causing traumatic dreams and event throughout their entire life. John the Dog was created in a freak accident after an artist accidentally brought his creation to life, and John began to spread his
curse.

I have succumb to the Curse of John the Dog. John the Dog has curse my whole bloodline!

by Gary Peacock February 5, 2025

Father John Misty

One of the best indie artist of all of the times, mahashmashana is his newest album to date, and his best (in my opinion fuck your opinion) is God's Favorite Customer

I have a big crush on Father John Misty
Father John Misty isn't that pedo priest from your church

by ThatGuyInAGasMask December 3, 2024

John

Greedy Little Bastard that lies to his mom and uses his friends for money and is Horny

Hey John
Your using me for money
um i bought you 50 bucks woth of playstation fuck head

by dgffgdfgdfgdfgfd June 15, 2022

john

isn’t allowed to date until he’s 18, but considers you his girlfriend anyways. he makes you feel like the best girl in the world, then breaks your heart bc he cares more about his sport than he does about you. who knows, things may work out in the future though.

no john is the sweetest.

i hate john so much.

by ajtheblondie March 30, 2021

john jerome

The finest man on the planet. Sweet. Marvelous. And simple all at once. If you meet someone named John Jerome they probably have a blue berry in their pocket, and even better yet, are probably willing to share. If you meet someone named John Jerome you are a lucky ducky.

John Jerome? I’m in love

by Melkywey November 22, 2021