Belief in God is WHATEVER I DO AND NOT THE THING I DON'T DO

No it isn't Jordan! No it isn't! This is You trying to reframe what constitutes belief to justify taking all of that Christian money. To believe in THE CHRISTIAN GOD is to believe that THE THINGS IN THE BOOK DID, ARE, AND WILL HAPPEN, Jordan. Is the Christian God THERE Jordan. Is it THERE and does it have the attributes it is depicted to have in the bible OR.... OR... IS IT NOT THERE, Jordan? Is that A THING THAT YOU THINK? DO YOU THINK THAT THE CREATURE IS THERE? IS THAT A THING YOU THINK OR DO YOU NOT THINK THAT? ARE YOU A BOY OR ARE YOU A GIRL, JORDAN?

Dr. JeepJorp Peepeestones "Belief in God is WHATEVER I DO AND NOT THE THING I DON'T DO! Ok!? So if I don't actually believe in God, then, actually believing in God isn't actually believing in God, OK!? Believing in God is something else entirely! Now... Ok!? You can't just ACTUALLY BELIEVE that God is THERE... You gotta... You gotta, like, grapple with the IDEA that it MIGHT be there! And then you gotta interpret the book so that WHATEVER YOU DO... Is doing the Book! Even if you contradict yourself AND THE BOOK! Right!? See, God (and by extension all higher-order abstractions) is whatever I need to do be, moment to moment, for me to maintain a certain level of moral superiority. So, maturity? Whatever I need it to be, moment to moment. Belief? Whatever I need it to be, moment to moment? God? You got it! Whatever I need it to be, moment to moment."

by Hym Iam May 21, 2024

I don't agree with the language

Used before a statement of agreement to indicate that the speaker doesn't particularly approve of foul (or just plain rude) language.

Driver: What the hell's this cocksucker doing here? This is the fast lane and he's driving like my gramps!

Passenger: I don't agree with the language, but you're right.

by Stupidly Sophisticated March 1, 2023

I don't really get paid enough to care

A person that doesnt do their job correctly or doesnt care about it, because said person isnt compensated enough to do so.

Person 1 to the maintenance crewman: ,,That pipe is leaking"
the maintenance crewman: ,,I don't really get paid enough to care"

by R_l_T November 24, 2024

I don't play games, I win them

When two people are arguing and one tells the other to "stop playing games"! Yet the other person is always right, so they don't play games... they win them!

Dude: "You really gotta chill out and stop playing games!"
Dudette: "I don't play games, I win them!"

by GlazeHer June 4, 2025

I don't know

Time when we should meet up

Typically about 7 P.M.

"When should we meet up at the spot ?"
"I don't know"
"Okay , I'll be there."

by MRFreeYee December 21, 2023

I don't wear a cap

Basically means "no cap", "I am not lying".

A: I live in a bungalow.
B: nah, cap.
A: I don't wear a cap.

by Spherism November 15, 2022

I don't speak russian I speak soviet

What literally i will say when i am in RUSSIA

me:*goes to russia*
russians:do you speak russian?
me:no
russians:then what language do you speak?
me: I don't speak russian i speak soviet
russians:how does this make any sense

by ihandlethisidk September 14, 2022