Santa Cocking

The act of having sexual intercourse inside of a chimney

Where are Mom and Dad it's Christmas Eve?

They're by the tree Santa Cocking

by chillbaby16 April 22, 2020

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Santa Handjob

An orgy activity in which several men lay naked next to each other while another person strokes their penises, one stroke at a time, going along the row of men, repeating as necessary until each man has ejaculated. It is named for its similarity in nature to the tale of Santa Claus, who enters homes through their chimneys to deliver presents and then quickly leaves, with the penises representing the chimneys and the hand representing Santa. Can also be done as a competition to see which man can last the longest.

Coworker 1: You gonna show up to the company Christmas party?
Coworker 2: As long as I don't have to witness a Santa Handjob like last year, then sure.
Coworker 1: I doubt that'll happen, that shit got three people fired.

by prismcheeto November 25, 2020

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Santa Claus

A creepy stalker who watches children 24/7 and makes a “naughty list” the uses this list to choose which children’s houses to break into and steal milk and baked goods, which undoubtedly contributes to his obesity. We don’t know much about him, but this old (probably in his 1000s) creep has gained the trust of children worldwide. The only question is, “Is Santa Claus coming to your town?”

Me: Hey, I just heard something on the roof!
Macaulay Culkin: I’ll go get em.
Me: but what if it’s Santa Claus?
Macaulay Culkin: You’re right... I’ll bring extra bricks!
Me: good thinking! Now go put an end to that creep!

by iabast December 25, 2020

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