This is the most offensive sexual act that has ever been performed in the history of Canada. It involves moose antlers, a gallon of maple syrup, 14.5 people. This makes the "Aristocrats" seem like soft core porn!
Canadian #1 : "Did you hear that the magazine 'The Beaver' is changing its name to 'Canada's History' because of the porn filters on search engines?"
Canadian #2 : "Oh no! Don't they know that 'Canada's History' is a lot worse than 'The Beaver'!!! What have they done!
Canadian #2 : "Oh no! Don't they know that 'Canada's History' is a lot worse than 'The Beaver'!!! What have they done!
by SColbert February 4, 2010
Get the Canada's Historymug. Girl's Gone Wild late-night advertisements, with bears, instead of girls. This is Steven Colbert's favorite/worst fantasy.
Also a strain of herpes.
Also a strain of herpes.
by alraKSphinx February 4, 2010
Get the Canada's Historymug. crap history, probably better know to most people as ancient history, is considered to be the most cruel and inhumane form of sadistic psychological torture known to human kind. It was submitted to the Department of Education accidentally and was somehow overlooked and made it's way onto the syllabus.
It is said that ancient history is soo bad that Satan himself rejected it as being used as a form of torture in hell.
Students who choose to take ancient history are immediately blacklisted for the rest of their lives. They are usually semi-illiterate and write on papyrus scrolls instead of pieces of A4 paper. The students also use quills and ink wells and use homing pigeons to send their messages.
People who do ancient history all turn gay, except the girls...who's vagina's invert into penises thus making them men..then they turn gay. ancient history also causes students who do it immense internal trauma that the body becomes overwhelmed and develops another chromosome causing ancient history students to become down syndrome along with gay. The only cure for symptoms of ancient history's plague is to revert back to the elixir, also known as Modern History.
By doing ancient history you automatically fail the hsc........and life in general.
It is said that ancient history is soo bad that Satan himself rejected it as being used as a form of torture in hell.
Students who choose to take ancient history are immediately blacklisted for the rest of their lives. They are usually semi-illiterate and write on papyrus scrolls instead of pieces of A4 paper. The students also use quills and ink wells and use homing pigeons to send their messages.
People who do ancient history all turn gay, except the girls...who's vagina's invert into penises thus making them men..then they turn gay. ancient history also causes students who do it immense internal trauma that the body becomes overwhelmed and develops another chromosome causing ancient history students to become down syndrome along with gay. The only cure for symptoms of ancient history's plague is to revert back to the elixir, also known as Modern History.
By doing ancient history you automatically fail the hsc........and life in general.
Ralph :What subjects are you doing?
Sam: Umm, i picked 12 units of Modern History
Ralph :Me too, what subjects did you pick Miles?
Miles: I chose English, Art, Multimedia, Bio, Maths and ancient history
Ralph: ANCIENT HISTORY!!!! may aswell kill yourself now! Thats the crap history, your not even repping modern you stupid mokes! Go change to modern right now!
Sam: It's already too late, he's already turning gay
Ralph: And down syndrome
Sam: Umm, i picked 12 units of Modern History
Ralph :Me too, what subjects did you pick Miles?
Miles: I chose English, Art, Multimedia, Bio, Maths and ancient history
Ralph: ANCIENT HISTORY!!!! may aswell kill yourself now! Thats the crap history, your not even repping modern you stupid mokes! Go change to modern right now!
Sam: It's already too late, he's already turning gay
Ralph: And down syndrome
by esh diggens January 16, 2009
Get the crap historymug. by milk ducks February 4, 2010
Get the Canada's Historymug. A sexual act that involves a can of shaving cream, Wayne Gretzky autographed hockey stick, Best of Bryan "Too Cool for an I" Adam's Cassette tape and magic.
This act can only be performed on a female. She must be laying in spread eagle like a maple leaf while her partner rams the Wayne Gretzky hockey stick in her anal cavity while the can of shaving cream in inserted into her vagina with the nozzle sticking outward. While the hockey sticking is thrusting back and forth the shaving is to be spayed up in the air to simulate snow. The Bryan Adam's Cassette tape is to be played in the background.
This act can only be performed on a female. She must be laying in spread eagle like a maple leaf while her partner rams the Wayne Gretzky hockey stick in her anal cavity while the can of shaving cream in inserted into her vagina with the nozzle sticking outward. While the hockey sticking is thrusting back and forth the shaving is to be spayed up in the air to simulate snow. The Bryan Adam's Cassette tape is to be played in the background.
Hey honey, Wayne Gretzky's hockey stick is still up my ass after we went over Canada's History last night.
by nusince February 4, 2010
Get the Canada's Historymug. a secret sexual act be-known only to the descendants of the French fur trappers who first settled in Canada. It involves a copious amount of males and the rack of a moose, maple syrup, and a silver bowl which has since been modified into the Stanley Cup. Although the action itself is classified those who accomplish the act are free to no longer live in Canada.
A lollipop is to the Wonka Factory as 2 girls 1 cup is to Canada's History.
Wow no more cancer, aids, war, healthcare costs, and Fox News. Really? I wonder who performed Canada's History to make that possible.
Wow no more cancer, aids, war, healthcare costs, and Fox News. Really? I wonder who performed Canada's History to make that possible.
by Lt. Barkey the Dog February 4, 2010
Get the Canada's Historymug. An incredibly long, drawn-out sexual act involving a man, a woman, their daughter and son, Grandma (it helps if she's from Quebec), the family collie, moose antlers, maple syrup and a piece of hockey equipment from a former Shawinigan Junior-B player named Red Stanley (aka "Stanley's Cup", sometimes misinterpreted as the trophy from a professional hockey league).
While the act itself is far to complex to explain without the use of diagrams, specially modified crash-test dummies and a pie-chart, it can sometimes be seen performed live on stage at an underground nightclub in Moose Jaw, Saskatchewan by a local theatre troupe known as "The Aristocrats".
While the act itself is far to complex to explain without the use of diagrams, specially modified crash-test dummies and a pie-chart, it can sometimes be seen performed live on stage at an underground nightclub in Moose Jaw, Saskatchewan by a local theatre troupe known as "The Aristocrats".
"Last night's performance of Canada's History was so intense that Grandma's glass-eye wouldn't come back out."
by grapevine1015 February 5, 2010
Get the Canada's Historymug.