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Canada's History

A depraved American sexual act involving moose antlers, maple syrup, and the Stanley Cup.

It's so depraved that it can't be described, even on urban dictionary, as those who may be offended have access to it.
"Dude... that chick has no respect for herself- she totally performed Canada's History with me!"

"Woah... You let her? Dude... you have no respect for YOURSELF!!"
by thischickoverhere February 4, 2010
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Canada's History

The act of giving oral sex to a moose while simultaneously having the exact number of gallons that can be filled into the Stanley Cup injected into the anal cavity with its left antler. The right antler is simply impossible within the current laws of physics.
My god. I just found out the definition of Canada's History. That is... wonderful.
by ForsFagerstrom February 25, 2010
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Canada's History

When you shove a Canadian Goose up your ass and use your free healthcare to repair your damaged anus.
"I just got back from the doctor's office, one more Canada's History and I'll be shitting feathers for the rest of my life."
by Amanda Beatnkill February 4, 2010
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Canada's History

While wearing a racoon skin hat, pour warm maple syrup down her back so she thinks you came. When she turns around, you knock her out with a hockey stick and start singing 'oh canada' with your member in her unconcious mouth. When she wakes up, you proceed to crap a hockey puck sized dumper on her chest.
Joe: Why is your girlfriend smelly and missing some teeth?

Me: She learned about Canada's history last night.
by Colbert Reporter February 4, 2010
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Canada's History

This is the most offensive sexual act that has ever been performed in the history of Canada. It involves moose antlers, a gallon of maple syrup, 14.5 people. This makes the "Aristocrats" seem like soft core porn!
Canadian #1 : "Did you hear that the magazine 'The Beaver' is changing its name to 'Canada's History' because of the porn filters on search engines?"

Canadian #2 : "Oh no! Don't they know that 'Canada's History' is a lot worse than 'The Beaver'!!! What have they done!
by SColbert February 4, 2010
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Canada's History

When you're going down on your girlfriend while simultaneously eating poutine.
My girlfriend was mad cause I gave her some Canada's History last night; she spent most of the night washing cheese curds out of her beaver.
by ColbertFanDC February 4, 2010
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Canada's History

An incredibly long, drawn-out sexual act involving a man, a woman, their daughter and son, Grandma (it helps if she's from Quebec), the family collie, moose antlers, maple syrup and a piece of hockey equipment from a former Shawinigan Junior-B player named Red Stanley (aka "Stanley's Cup", sometimes misinterpreted as the trophy from a professional hockey league).

While the act itself is far to complex to explain without the use of diagrams, specially modified crash-test dummies and a pie-chart, it can sometimes be seen performed live on stage at an underground nightclub in Moose Jaw, Saskatchewan by a local theatre troupe known as "The Aristocrats".
"Last night's performance of Canada's History was so intense that Grandma's glass-eye wouldn't come back out."
by grapevine1015 February 5, 2010
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